"blah...offset costs...blah...blah..."

I was filling the tank this morning at the local servo, when I heard a noise.  Talking.  Close by.  Something I'd never heard before, but pretty much dismissed as there is a workshop just over the fence from the pump I was at.

Then I realised it was words I'd heard before.  An ad?  It was coming from nearby.  Very near by.

Then I glanced up, and I saw IT.  Look carefully.

A television.  Or at least a screen, displaying television.  Doubtless some tie in with Shell and Coles and Channel 7, who's morning news was on after the ads.

Seriously?  Shell suddenly find enough money to install these moronic devices on every pump?  And they reckon they're not taking everyone to town on pricing (and not just in the servo)?  I'm sure Shell/Coles will have a press release or statement ready to roll for complaints or queries, something like "advertising allows us to offset and absorb costs that would otherwise be passed on to the consumer".  Hmmmm.

I want a mobile phone to make calls.  I want a digital camera to take photos.  And I want a servo to be a servo.  A service station is not an opportunity to multi-task.  I pay you money for petrol.  And maybe an iced coffee now and then.  But expect people to pay an extra few cents per litre plus forty cents on every item so you can advertise, and you can be sure people will flock away.  Here's a discussion you won't hear:

She: "Darling, lets get fuel at the Shell, they have those nice little televisions"
He: "But Pookie, we've already blown the petrol budget in 3 months...once we get two skim latte's, a bag of soy chips and the sneaky Mars bar with it, it all adds up you know, and daycare isn't free..."

She: "Darling, they have those nice little televisions..." (cue patronising arm rub)

Turn a service station BACK into a servo.  On a side note, look for little televisions at supermarket checkouts and aisles real soon.

Mind you, these are probably great for people like the couple in front of myself and GLW who spent the first fifteen minutes of last nights Pearl Jam concert updating Facebook and Twitter from their iphones.

Insert tagline here...

Wheels, baby, wheels...

Hola amigos.


I know its been a while since I rapped at ya, but not much has been happening to tell the truth. Nothing of much note, just living as best I can manage with the Good Lady and the Offshoots and working a bit more than normal.


I've been sans car for four weeks now, and its going alright. I'm bussing it to work with the unwashed masses, which is taking about the same amount of time as driving. And iys easier once I get to the office as I can just leave the driver to park it for me instead of crawling around having to find a space for the day.

I test drove a Mitsubishi Mirage on saturday that I'd spotted, which turned out to be a bit underwhelming in all respects. A bit wishy-washy with throttle response, a faint smell of smoker inside, and a bit floaty steering wise. It sure wouldnt win any performance contests in its current guise. Maybe I've been spoiled with my last vehicle, which had more power and torque, and definitely more character.

So the search goes on. It better hurry, as the Good Lady is due with Offshoot #3 within a month, and without a car I'm just asking for trouble.

Insert tagline here...

Please get off the Australian Coast

If you live anywhere near the coast of Australia, and in particular the eastern coast, you will no doubt have noticed the stickers bearing place names with the tagline "somewhere on the australian coast" beneath. Avalon, in Sydney's northern beaches, for example:

This may actually have been the originating location in Australia for these stickers.

Of course there are some humorous larrikins who extend the range of these, and re-word the tagline to suit their town or place:

Rather.

And the version generally seen on utes and older model vehicles bearing P-plates:

Ah, yes. Tagline should read "inside this vehicle".

Usually with this sticker the person inside the vehicle fits the description, and drives accordingly.


There is one exception to this variation that is highly acceptable:

It's a unique Australian ability to be able to eat this stuff.

Driving to work the other morning I saw what is perhaps the ultimate corruption of the (until now) tolerable branding:

Please try to be more obscure, thats the one delight in these things!

Now, either someone has had this printed specifically, taken this model to America and marketed it, or we've knocked it off yet again. The fact that it is spelled with an accent leads me to believe the former. Only a non-New Yorker would spell New York this way. Sure, the New York accent as depicted is but a mere portion of New York, but hey, lets generalise.

Perhaps it is only a matter of time till these version appear on our shores:

Bought back by our latest Paris-Dakar competitor.

Hello Norway.

Ah, Estonia! Land of the massive 318m Suur Munamägi

Maybe they're already big in Europe. Maybe every Skoda in Estonia wears a Tallinn sticker.

Lastly, I leave you with the model I would like to see.

No, you cant put it on your Mercedes, thats the point.

Insert tagline here...