The Great White Hype

Doorknockers'R'Us

2011-08-24T10:54:00.000+10:00

Listening to a segment on morning radio titled 'how do you deal with Mormons' driving to work today, I was reminded of a visit from the Mormons that I had over 5 years ago, at a previous residence. The results from the callers to the station ranged from suitably polite, through mildly impolite, to spectacularly bad-taste.

The Mormons that came to my door offered me a copy of their Book of Mormon, which I took. They did return a week or so later asking "Are you going to join us?"

"No fellas, I haven't read all of your book yet..." They seemed a little dismayed. Which I thought they'd have been used to after fifteen months of their mission. I wonder what their success rate is? Long story short, we moved a few weeks later and I never saw them again. I've still got their Book of Mormon, though. Still mostly unread.

The Mormons haven't come to the new place in 5 years, but the Seventh Day Adventists have been a couple of times. One pair landed on Easter Sunday, so I wished them a happy Easter, partly realising they don't necessarily partake of Easter as Catholics do. The other family called by a couple of times, until they were told Catholicism Lives Here, and will do so for a long time to come.

To an extent, its the Catholic Missionary taken to grass roots in a community with an already-established religious bent. Can Mormon missions be compared to Catholic missionaries of the 1800's, preaching and converting Africa, Amazonian tribes, etc?

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Michael Corleone says "hello"....

2010-12-07T21:33:00.000+11:00

When making a donkey's head for The Boy's nativity play at school, isn't it natural to be side-tracked into the Godfather? Though Khartoum was a little less comical in his effect.

*Actual size = 70mm nose to ear

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Let's Mess with Texas

2010-05-19T11:06:00.002+10:00

I read this article on the Sydney Morning Herald website this morning, and had to marvel at what a system the US education board setups are. To learn a little more, read the Wiki articles on US Education, School Board and School District. In the District article, it notes that Texas has a unique setup. This is also noted here.

"Texas — Here, "Independent" denotes that the district is separate from any county- or municipal-level entity. All of the state's school districts, with only one exception (Stafford Municipal School District), are independent of any municipal or county control. Moreover, school district boundaries rarely coincide with municipal limits or county lines. Most districts use the term "Independent School District" in their name; in the few cases where the term "Common School District" is used the district is still an independent governmental entity."

Texan School Districts are actively independent, answering to none but themselves it appears. And the power they wield seems very strong, as the reference to textbooks and other states following suit would attest. As for the curriculum, one new board member refers to changes being made as 'corrections'.

"Those corrections prompted a blizzard of accusations of rewriting history and indoctrinating children by promoting right-wing views on religion, economics and guns while diminishing the science of evolution, the civil rights movement and the horrors of slavery."

It continues: "Several changes include sidelining Thomas Jefferson, who favoured separation of church and state, while introducing a new focus on the ''significant contributions'' of pro-slavery Confederate leaders during the civil war. Study of Sir Isaac Newton is dropped in favour of examining scientific advances through military technology.

The education board has dropped references to the slave trade in favour of calling it the ''Atlantic triangular trade'', and recasts the Israeli-Palestinian conflict as driven by Islamic fundamentalism."

They're very savage 'corrections'. Dilution and rewriting of history, selective quoting and paraphrasing of historical events, non-separation of church and state, and a belief in the US as the worlds moral flagship are all on the cards. There are glaringly obvious things there that are seemingly at odds with a christian viewpoint of morals and ethics, even as I have been taught and shown to understand them. Can someone explain how slavery was a positive act of history?

And of course, underlying all this is the Intelligent Design or Creationism argument that is ever so popular among the US christian movements. While many are happy to tout the line "teach ID and evolutionary science side by side", the reality seems to be "teach ID, mention evolution as an alternative...in that order".

I often wonder whether fundamentalists would get voted in if everyone was obliged to vote on matters such as this. It possibly reflects a lack of care, or more likely an over-zealousness on the part of the religious elements, that this is even happening in the first place.

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Coincidence?

2010-04-28T14:19:00.000+10:00

Nuh-uh!

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Doctor Henry Marsh

2010-04-21T11:30:00.000+10:00

Tuesday nights on SBS at the moment are medical night, starting with "Blood and Guts: A History of Surgery", a very informative show. But last night I caught the better part of a documentary called "The English Surgeon" which was screened later in the night.

The central subject is Dr. Henry Marsh, a British neurosurgeon who has been making trips, in his own spare time, to the Ukraine to assist an out-of-the-box doctor named Igor Kurilets. I use the term more for his treatment setup than his personality. He works in a country historically dogged by the Communist regime and its manifold ways and structures that have left it with a health system, among other systems, that many western nations would consider barely functioning.

Unfortunately I missed the beginning of the show, unaware that it was on. I was hooked once I stumbled across it, even though it was a quarter done. In one of the first scenes I caught it showed Dr. Marsh, annoyed at the bureaucratic tangle of the UK health system, leaving his computer and stalking off to cool down. He explains to the camera once at home that he is taking medical equipment to the Ukraine on his next trip, displaying drill bits that the UK system disposes of after one use. They have a plastic insert, so cant be re-sterilised, and at £80 for each one, he estimates that they use, in his hospital alone, 10 of them each week. And then they throw them out. £800 a week, £4000 a year, more or less. He and Igor open one up after he arrives in the Ukraine, remove the plastic insert, sterilise it, and it is soon put to good use with a Ryobi cordless drill to remove a brain tumour from a young man suffering epileptic fits.

Dr. Marsh himself proved to be fascinating man of some depth. Throughout the documentary, a young girl named Tanya is mentioned. His face and speech seem to change whenever she is discussed. Dr. Marsh had bought her to the UK a few years before the documentary was shown to remove a tumour that had paralysed the side of her face, after Moscow and Kiev surgeons said it was inoperable. He looked and sounded genuinely haunted by the fact that Tanya had suffered as a result of what he had done. Her quality of life suffered after two operations he performed on her, her death seemingly inevitable by Ukrainian standards, but possibly not by UK standards. He visits her mother at her home at the end of the documentary, wholly welcomed by the family.

He sits in Dr. Kurilets office meeting with patients, honestly and rapidly assessing their chances, realistic that the majority of cases are inoperable or too far developed to render enough assistance because of the systems in place. While a brain scan may only cost $50 to $100, many Ukrainians cannot spare that amount. And when they do manage to, or are forced to through physical problems caused by the tumours, they often result in a dire prognosis. We see a young girl who is already blind from her tumour growth. The grandmother who is told her young granddaughter is inoperable and left with a year or so to live. The 23 year old woman with the spreading tumour that no surgery anywhere could repair. And Marian, the young man with the epileptic seizures who is operated on with the home handyman tools available.

I hope I can see all of this in the future. If you get a chance to watch it, it's well worth seeing.

Handy Henry Marsh at the Times Online

Henry Marsh interview at NPR.org (transcript and download at US National Public Radio)

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A Sunday Ride

2010-04-19T10:25:00.001+10:00

Seeing as not much and too much is happening at the same time, and I'm not getting anything written down at all, its time I did something. So I'll tell you about my Sunday ride.

Every Sunday (mostly) I meet up with three other guys and go for a ride. Sometimes nobody turns up, sometimes I don't, sometimes we get less than four. Actually, it's unusual we get four. It's not a testosterone-fuelled blitzfest, nor is it necessarily a sedate amble. Nothing dictates your speed, there's not a 'no drop' policy in force, and you're not obliged to keep up or slow down for anyone else. There's a turnaround point where we join up, chat for five or ten minutes, then ride back to the start point in much the same fashion.

Yesterday was myself and one other. I'll call him John, cause that's his name. John is a strong rider, and is generally stronger on the flat than I am. Up short hills he just powers on at the same rate while I drop back a gear or two and spin faster to try to keep up. He's also a better descender than me. He rides motorbikes for enjoyment, and is pretty seriously into it, so he has better skills than I do at speed. We swapped the front going out to the turn-around and had a light tailwind, which of course means headwind going back. This middling weather brings people out a lot, and there were a lot of riders out on the regular route we ride. In a few weeks it will get colder in the mornings and I reckon numbers will drop off. It'll get darker too, so the lights will make an appearance soon.

We also have a pair of Gary's to complete the four. To be honest, I don't know if they're Gary, Garry, Garey or otherwise, I've never asked. One is a strong flat rider, who usually tows us outbound at a fair pace. The other is happy to pull his 25km/h from start to end and meet up. It's a good bunch to be involved in.

There's the obligatory post-ride coffee, supplied by whoever reckons its their turn, combined with more talk regarding whatever. Motorsport, football, politics, etc. Typical stuff. Then we part ways till next weekend, or whenever someone thinks they'll be back.

I won't bore you with the in-depth stats, but 37km @ 29.7km/h is what we ended up with. Last sunday we ticked the 30km/h average box on the to-do list for the first time, probably thanks to a tow out and a good pickup for a little way coming back.

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STUFF! (that looks like other stuff*): Part 5

2010-03-22T09:30:00.001+11:00

Why not recommence this with part 5 of...

STUFF!
(that looks like other stuff)*

A peek into the future, when Tasmania becomes a distant cousin of the mainland:

A collueague submitted image following a morning spent sanding weatherboard for repainting.

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* A shamelessly stolen idea, thanks Ben.

This is my day today

2009-11-30T09:34:00.000+11:00

Already.

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"blah...offset costs...blah...blah..."

2009-11-23T09:35:00.001+11:00

I was filling the tank this morning at the local servo, when I heard a noise. Talking. Close by. Something I'd never heard before, but pretty much dismissed as there is a workshop just over the fence from the pump I was at.

Then I realised it was words I'd heard before. An ad? It was coming from nearby. Very near by.

Then I glanced up, and I saw IT. Look carefully.

A television. Or at least a screen, displaying television. Doubtless some tie in with Shell and Coles and Channel 7, who's morning news was on after the ads.

Seriously? Shell suddenly find enough money to install these moronic devices on every pump? And they reckon they're not taking everyone to town on pricing (and not just in the servo)? I'm sure Shell/Coles will have a press release or statement ready to roll for complaints or queries, something like "advertising allows us to offset and absorb costs that would otherwise be passed on to the consumer". Hmmmm.

I want a mobile phone to make calls. I want a digital camera to take photos. And I want a servo to be a servo. A service station is not an opportunity to multi-task. I pay you money for petrol. And maybe an iced coffee now and then. But expect people to pay an extra few cents per litre plus forty cents on every item so you can advertise, and you can be sure people will flock away. Here's a discussion you won't hear:

She: "Darling, lets get fuel at the Shell, they have those nice little televisions"
He: "But Pookie, we've already blown the petrol budget in 3 months...once we get two skim latte's, a bag of soy chips and the sneaky Mars bar with it, it all adds up you know, and daycare isn't free..."

She: "Darling, they have those nice little televisions..." (cue patronising arm rub)

Turn a service station BACK into a servo. On a side note, look for little televisions at supermarket checkouts and aisles real soon.

Mind you, these are probably great for people like the couple in front of myself and GLW who spent the first fifteen minutes of last nights Pearl Jam concert updating Facebook and Twitter from their iphones.

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Thierry Henry, BFO

2009-11-19T17:05:00.000+11:00

Thierry Henry is today hereby bestowed a BFO.

For his part in the World Cup qualification win over the Republic of Ireland, Henry is now a Bastard of the First Order.

Henry joins Diego Maradonna as the only BFO's to impact World Cup Football with their hands.

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This is my day today

2009-11-19T09:30:00.000+11:00

I didn't bring a Plan C.

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The Knifethrower

2009-11-05T10:10:00.004+11:00

I really like this picture.

Image: tumblr.com

You could never get a photo like this now. Not without the howls of child abuse, exploitation and such.

But think about it. The guy obviously trusts his skills, his training, his connection with his child that much, that he can throw knives by a child.

Now that's a bond.

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Not-so-passive agressive

2009-10-26T16:34:00.000+11:00

I found this gem on a recent site visit.

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Nuffy-ism: Air Travel

2009-10-13T08:57:00.003+11:00

What is it about airports and plane travel that brings out the inner idiot in a lot of people?

You always get the nuffy who forgot, or just didn't want to, remove the coins out of their pockets or take off their watch for the metal detector. And then get huffy when they've got to go back through. Let's call this person The Huffy Nuffy. Sure, I've had to go back and take off my belt, but only ever in Melbourne. No other scanner has been set off by my belt. Voyueristic Melbourne security staff, perhaps? Men in suits are never The Huffy Nuffy. They've done this too often to be that stupid. Watch them closely. Watch, phone, wallet, business card holder and bag on the conveyor, walk through, smile at the security staff, pick everything up and leave. Unlike the nouveau riche entrepreneur in his designer tee shirt and jeans. I'm surprised he remembered to put his bag down.

Then you get the nuffy who suddenly thinks queueing in an orderly fashion to board a plane is too much for them. They decide to break the line and skirt to the outside, angling in close to the head of a long bunch. Let's call this person The Tuffy Nuffy. Newsflash, hotshot: everyone is getting on the same plane. These people also unbuckle their seatbelt and leap to their feet the instant the plane stops at the gate, grabbing their bag from the overhead and standing around looking frustrated. Another newsflash, hotshot: everyone is getting off the same plane. Sure, you can get out before the skybridge is in place, but watch the first step. I wouldn't want you to do that, then you wont make me laugh next time I fly.

Most of them are probably smokers, keen to get outside and shorten their lives ASAP. Let's call this person The Puffy Nuffy. Many of them divert past the baggage collection to grab their first rapid half-cigarette, before returning inside to get their bags.

Once you get to the baggage collection, you always find some nuffy who stands right at the little door the conveyor emerges from, so they can have bag in hand and be off within seconds. Let's call this person The Stuffy Nuffy. These people do not want to stand around for even the extra thirty seconds their baggage might take to get to the far end. They do not want to imagine the technology within. They do not want to admire the conservative architecture of the airport. The Stuffy Nuffy wants to get out, get home, and complain about the quality of cheap flight they just left. Or get back out for a smoke.

You also see The Tuffy Nuffy waiting for the transfer bus, hanging back at the head of a line of fifty people. The bus pulls up and the Tuffy Nuffy makes a direct line for the door, ahead of 46 other patient, non-self-absorbed people. I'd rather wait for the next bus, knowing the Tuffy Nuffy on board will have to battle through the crowded bus, angering those non-nuffy's as they try to extract their one carry-on sized case from the bottom of a pile of enormously heavy family holiday suitcases. Incidentally, you rarely see The Tuffy Nuffy at the taxi queue, as these are now supervised, which voids their game plan quick-smart.

I'm sure there's more, but Huffy, Tuffy, Puffy and Stuffy were in abundance on the weekend.

I guess much of this is due to the fact that a lot of air travel is now seen as commuting, or short haul flying for quick trips. Its not a romantic ideal any more. Which is a shame.

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Ben more than 10...

2009-09-10T20:48:00.005+10:00

Anyone with sons of a certain age would probably know about Ben 10. Ben Tennyson, a young boy who finds an alien watch-like artefact that lets him turn into any one of ten different creatures. Eleven if you count them all, perhaps more by now.

Ben's ten years old. His cousin, Gwen, is also 10.

So explain to me whats going on in the sticker that was in the (quite obviously a knockoff) sticker pack???

I cant.

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Samuel Johnson is nearly everywhere again

2009-09-01T10:41:00.003+10:00

I was flicking channels last night, listening to Samuel Johnson narrate a documentary series called 'Beyond the Darklands'. It's a crime show, based around serial killers murderers. I flicked across to watch some of the MotoGP for a few minutes. I came back, to hear Samuel Johnson's voice again, pausing to see where Darklands was up to.

Something had changed, but the voice remained. Dogs rolling about playfully? Smiling owners?

I think we're going back to the days of the early 00's where Samuel Johnson was everywhere.

Rush. Darklands. PAL ads. I think there's even re-runs of 'Secret Life Of Us' on Foxtel someplace as well.

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A few of problems I have with governance and money

2009-08-28T09:21:00.003+10:00

A few things have happened lately that have irked me a lot. Not just a bit, a whole lot. So much so that I question certain systems. Everyone does this now and then. But these ones just really got me annoyed.

The first is the Superannuation system, and the government mandated 9% contributions.

A lot has been made of superannuation funds losing money, causing some people nearing retirement age to think again. Their super fund is suddenly worth 20% less than it was twelve months ago, and they simply cant afford to retire.

As was pointed out, and I completely agree with, why should something we are legally obliged to contribute to, and have little control over, be able to lose money hand over fist?

Why should I pay 9% of my wage into a pool that may well disappear before I have a chance to use it? Can I not contribute that money where I control it? Then again, who wants the trouble of doing that? If I am being forced to pay this, then it should be protected, in the same way that banking deposits are treated. I dont give the bank my wage and then go to withdraw it only to be told "sorry sir, its all gone". Superannuation should not be any different.

Of course there is the demand that superannuation grow and prosper, leading to risk and exposure. So make it 15%, protect it, and retire later. The days of retiring at 55 and then taking a world trip are long gone. Jet travel has seen to that. People see the value in spending now, leaving the super as a necessary evil until they absolutely need it.

The second thing is Medicare, bulk billing, and child immunisations.

Again, this is another case of one of those things you have to do, at your own peril. Some people dont agree with immunisation for various reasons, and rightly so. They can be risky. We all know someone who has been impacted by immunisation side-effects, in mild or severe forms.

Case in point: #3 went for her 12 month immunisation this past week. $62 for three needles.

$62 for something that any school in the country will ask for proof of. $62 for something that if she didnt have them, she would not be allowed in daycare. $62 for something that the government medical offices have sent us letters asking "why is this overdue?". $62 for something that nobody obviously sees as 'optional'.

How much did Medicare reimburse us for the privilege of doing what is required? About half. What is going so wrong behind the scenes that the doctors feel obliged to charge double the going rate for sticking required needles into kids for three minutes? You can bet if we were in a lower socio-economic suburb we'd be bulk-billed without question.

I'm not demanding free national healthcare, but its things like this that really irritate me.

Which brings me to my third item. What compounds the doctor issue for me is the private healthcare for over 30's issue. If you're over 30 and dont have private health insurance, the government will increase your tax for the rest of your life. You have no way to remedy this. You are marked for life.

This has the seeminlgy nett effect that private hospitals are turning into money factories, and the funds are coming from private health funds. As people opt for surgery in private institutions due the 'ailing nature of public facilities', they see the cost as their basic excess. Surely $250 for fixing that dodgy knee is a small price to pay now rather than wait 2 years to get it done free by so-viewed 'second rate' doctors forced to work in the public system? It may seem a good option, but the doctor at the private institution charges the fund five times that, and the premiums inexorably go up to cover every man and his dog getting it done.

Dont sit back and say the thought hasnt crossed your mind that private hospital doctors are a better class of doctor just because of where they work. You know it has.

Its a cycle of money feeding on money, and its just one thing that stinks.

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One of those calls

2009-08-19T13:30:00.005+10:00

I had a great phone call in the office the other afternoon. Ostensibly it was "large format inkjet printer market research". Not a problem. Except for the lady on the other end of the line, who obviously wasnt in Australia.

Indian accent. Delays on each sentence. Difficulty grasping some Australian english terms. Asking whether I was on Melbourne time.

One of my favourite parts was the confusion created by the fact that our large format printer is (what I believed) neither inkjet or laserjet based technology.

"Is it inkjet, sir?"

"No...its a large format photocopier technology that also prints..."

"So its inkjet, sir?"

"I dont believe so, no 'ink' is involved, it uses toner."

"So its inkjet, sir?"

"Uh...no. It doesnt use ink."

"What model is it?"

"Ricoh..." yada, yada, yada.

"Give me a moment sir. I cannot find that model on Google. Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Give me a moment sir. I cannot find that model on Google. Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Is it a ..." at which point our Indian struggler rattles off twenty options on machine models, none of which are ours.

"Give me a moment sir. I cannot find that model on Google. Are you sure?"

"Try putting WP at the end of it."

"Give me a moment sir. Ricoh 3***WP?"

"Yes."

"OK. It says that it is inkjet technology."

"Well, it doesnt use ink, so if you reckon thats it, go for it."

"I dont understand sir?"

"Of course not...go ahead."

From there we rattled off two minutes of questions about importance of features, brand recognition, etc, etc. You know the type of thing.

What would've been four minutes worth of call ended up at ten minutes plus. All due to struggling with the model number that was of no importance at all. The obligitory questions came at the end:

"May we have your email address sir?"

"No."

Stunned silence.

"OK. Your number is 2, 94..." etc.

"Yes. They didnt teach you very well. You dont know our phone numbering system very well do you?"

"Pardon sir?"

"Never mind. Next question?"

"That completes the survey. Is there anything you'd like to ask me?"

How is Bangalore today? Can you make a butter chicken? Do you prefer garlic naan or plain naan? Will Tendulkar last much longer? What are you going to do with this call you've recorded for 'quality purposes'? Why were you rude to our secretary when I wasnt in last week? Can you juggle? Why have you made me late for dinner?

"No, goodbye."

I hung up before the reply.

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Mark Webber cracks it

2009-08-05T09:26:00.002+10:00

Following on from Mark Webber's friendly warning of last month, those of you who have just crawled out from under a rock would be unaware that Mark Webber won the German Formula One Grand Prix last month. 132 starts for that 1st victory. I'd bet a fair few people would have given up long before that. The fact that he qualified a lot of inferior cars up the order obviously gave a bit of hope.

First Australian win since AJ in 1981. I'm surprised they had the Australian national anthem ready to go.

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A friendly warning

2009-06-23T08:49:00.000+10:00

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Dublin Bus has got still my €0.50!

2009-06-16T10:04:00.005+10:00

I was just digging around in my jacket at work after doing the coffee run, and I found this:

Dublin Bus has still got my €0.50.

I wonder if I can redeem it at the office if and when I go back? That may be some years.

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"I'm not wearing a tie at all!"

2009-05-25T13:21:00.003+10:00

In honour of Lionel Hutz, I thought I'd post this little gem of a picture I found in my local paper.

Look close...tell me whats wrong with the photo...

It sure is a bad angle, or the woman on the left isnt actually wearing pants...

It's not usually a nudist beach!

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"Our Game Apologises"

2009-05-12T08:57:00.003+10:00

Charles Barkley was right. And I've agreed with him for years.

Is there any more proof that sports people shouldnt be role models?

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Le portrait de Max

2009-05-11T10:01:00.004+10:00

Max is my father's Fox Terrier. She's been around a while, as you can tell from the photo. She's getting on a little. While she's mellowing in some ways in her old age, you still don't leave her alone around small children, lizards or birds. Unless you want them eliminated.

Happy, crabby, jealous, intrigued, lazy, active, snappy, licky, and instinctive.

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It's not like nothing happened...

2009-04-29T12:40:00.002+10:00

Sheesh! 6 weeks and I've not written anything? What's going wrong?

It's not like nothing happened...

The Boy, Little Miss and #3 are busy, busy...Good Lady Wife is real busy...I'm real busy despite a downturn in work...

It's all a bit of a headspin really. Still, I shouldn't be surprised, it happens every year about this time. Then we hit winter, and it slows down a bit.

Fingers crossed.

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The hamstring destroying weekend of fun

2009-03-09T10:09:00.003+11:00

This fine, feathered monday morning finds me in a little trouble at the old desk here.

You see, I offered up my services at The Boy's school on saturday for some yard work, which involved a lot of weeding of gardens followed by wheelbarrow loads of mulch spread by hand. Naturally, this involved a lot of squatting, bending, and general leg work. Not something I do a lot of, but it was good to lend a hand and get outside for a few hours of manual labour.

I felt the legs tightening that evening, but nothing too bad.

Sunday I got up early for my weekly bike ride, with just myself and one other regular attending. Whilst not setting a cracking pace like the week before, we still steamed out on the flats, definitely working the legs over. I got home and felt good, the warm up and down doing the legs good.

But now, monday, let me just say this: uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh

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Now we can move on, yes?

2009-02-24T09:19:00.001+11:00

Heath Ledger won his Oscar. Kate Winslet won hers.

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Black Saturday 2009

2009-02-10T11:09:00.003+11:00

By now the world knows about the bushfires that ripped Victoria's middle to pieces last weekend. The death toll is rising rapidly now that the fire has passed and teams are able to access townships and homes destroyed.

An opinion piece has been posted in The Age by a former fire-based magazine editor. He makes several valid points, although perhaps some people wont want to read to them right now. Points raised could have saved many lives.

I have never been close a large bushfire. I have seen what the end result is though, and through the internet I think a whole lot more people are seeing the destruction caused. Although Saturday was such a unique set of circumstances, as the author points out, they were no worse than previous fires that resulted in significantly less lives lost. Granted, people dont want someone to tell them to evacuate their home if they cant see a threat, but Saturday's fire turned and swallowed several towns that could have been emptied hours earlier.

The one point that I would distinctly agree with, no question, is the mandatory bushfire shelter or fire proof structure in fire-prone areas. There exist building standards for fire-prone areas now, and an expansion would be simple. More cost to the home-builder? Certainly.

But what's your life worth?

I sincerely hope you haven't lost any friends or family in these fires.

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Sir David Attenborough gets hate mail...

2009-01-28T12:52:00.002+11:00

And these select Christians think of themselves as forgiving and understanding?

Link.

I pity them. I really do. Perhaps its an unfortunate case of 'all tarred with the same brush', but you cant be a creationist and not a Christian. Although, you can be a Christian without being a creationist. Try it sometime.

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Your month by the stars - February

2009-01-15T09:30:00.003+11:00

Aquarius - January 21 - February 19

A bout of Dengue Fever will halt your marathon pie-eating attempt, but don’t take it to heart. The support base of family and friends will still be in town after their hospital visit. You should anticipate a month-long recovery and simply try again.

Lucky letter: G

Pisces - February 20- March 20

Flying at such high altitudes is just asking for trouble. You deserve what’s coming. Listen for the phrase “Watch your six…”, then panic.

Lucky letter: C

Aries - March 21 - April 20

Your month holds promise as the total stranger you saw on the news as “the only person ever to return from an event horizon” (not the movie) awakes from a coma speaking your name.

Lucky letter: S

Taurus - April 21 - May 21

That business prospect in central Europe that you are intent on seeing should remain at a good distance for another few weeks. Just until this whole "global economic crisis” thing blows over. It’s remarkable how the human brain can adapt to tough situations and still see a sucker coming a mile off.

Lucky letter: W

Gemini - May 22 - June 21

Your neighbours are always fighting, their dog keeps coming into your yard and defecating on your lawn, and now their step-son is hooking up with your foster daughter. It can get worse though. Keep the baseball bat handy at night.

Lucky letter: B

Cancer - June 22 - July 22

There’s a Tom Jones lookalike contest on the 25th at your local entertainment venue of choice. You should enter, cause I just got a good feelin’ about this one.

Lucky letter: P

Leo - July 23 -August 21

Human Botfly larva. Google it before your upcoming trip. Take tweezers.

Lucky letter: F

Virgo - August 22 - September 23

Graphic design was always your strong point. Staying off the drink was not. Your strategy, however, will pay off handsomely when you forget about the meeting you had scheduled, and in a hung-over state, give the board of Shell the 1970 version of their own logo in the hope they forgot what it looked like.

Lucky letter: H

Libra - September 24 - October 23

Mark the 2028 Olympics down now for the debut of your as yet unborn child in the sport she will pioneer. Oh, and a boyfriend is in your near future, too.

Lucky letter: Z

Scorpio - October 24 - November 22

An old friend will re-enter your life, and your bank accounts while you are drugged and face down on your bed. You can scarcely imagine what else he will enter while you’re out. Take precautions and be very wary.

Lucky letter: L

Sagittarius - November 23 - December 22

Scandinavia used to be so friendly and open. What happened?

Lucky letter: Q

Capricorn - December 23 - January 20

New Zealand Customs officials will question the birth date on your passport as you try to get out of the country following your visit to their highly renowned plastic surgeon. They don’t take too kindly to 10-year old boys flying on their own. Rethink your level of surgery, particularly if you are a 52-year old woman.

Lucky letter: Y

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Sydney's NYE Celebrations

2008-12-09T16:21:00.002+11:00

The City of Sydney have announced that the theme for this year's New Year's Eve celebrations is Creation.

In a note to other groups, the City said:

Weightlifters - the theme is not Creatine. Don't break out the plastic spoons and milkshakes just yet
Christians - the theme is not Creationism. Do not expect Dinosaurs to magically appear from some unseen force only to vanish equally as fast, nor should you expect anyone to believe your story.
Darwinists - the theme is not opposed to you specifically. We're not all that stupid.
Literary persons - we are not having a live reading Gore Vidal's novel, Creation.
Iodine deficients - the theme is not Cretinism. Don't feel victimised.

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Kermit the...blerrrrghhhh!

2008-11-24T10:55:00.003+11:00

"I feel kinda crook....oh no...blerrrggghhhhhhh..."

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Song of the Week

2008-11-14T14:39:00.004+11:00

Yeah, yeah...very lax...

But this is a great Australian song.

Oh no, not you again
Australian Crawl

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Sometimes I miss these

2008-10-27T20:49:00.005+11:00

Sydney Buses.

Strangely enough, yeah. Public transport is OK sometimes. Gives you a chance to read those novels you want to get into, newspapers, magazines, advertising material, etc. And when you live on the bus route I do, they always start and finish looking like this. No worries about standing about swaying and lurching for an hour as you bump into other commuters.

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Singapore, Day Thirty-One

2008-10-07T11:53:00.003+11:00

Yeah, yeah...this is late. Very late. But what can you do?

Singapore, Day Thirty-One, stopping off on the way home. We had a lot of chop coming out of Heathrow, the worst I've flown in by far. When you drop what feels like 6 feet in an instant, you're grateful for seatbelts. 12+ hours later, we landed in Singapore at 1pm monday. I didn't sleep on the plane, more a light doze. Of course, being 6'2" and having a seat in your knees rarely helps. I'm just thankful it wasn't 20 hours straight through.

Got to the hotel and thought about sleeping early, but pushed on. Funnily enough I enjoyed the steam and the afternoon rain, and sparked up enough to get out and get some Indian at local food court (for want of a better term). I went down the next morning and got measured up to have a suit made, and found a cheaper internet place than the first time to send emails home. Up at 6am the day after for the run home to Sydney. Landed at 7pm or so, and got out quickly through customs and quarantine. I never had a delay getting through another airport out of all the ones we went in or out of (Singapore, Frankfurt, Munich, Cork, Dublin, Glasgow, Edinburgh, Heathrow), just Sydney. Makes you wonder about US airports.

Cab home to the Good Lady Wife, with the Offshoots already tucked up in bed. Presents the next morning, before The Boy and Little Lady went to daycare.

I'll fill in the rest of the trip soon. Honest.

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Singapore, Day One

2008-09-01T00:17:00.004+10:00

Well...got to Sinkers without trouble. On time leaving Sydney, bit bumpy the first half hour, so much so they suspended the meal service! The flight smoothed out quickly though. The back seats were quite good actually, and walking room was OK. Watched Indiana Jones and Kung Fu Panda, read half of the book I'd bought, and stared out the windows a bit.

We landed in a misty Singapore at 5:45PM local time. By 7:20pm we were at the hotel, and went looking for a feed. Found a cheap and cheery place up the road and got spruiked inside by an amiable lady.

Came downstairs to find internet, found it (obviously), and sent messages via email to home and The Brother Man. His bag turned up!

Going to try Sentosa tomorrow, and keep an eye out for gifts we'll get on the way back through. Maybe try the big wheel they've got. It's 10:20pm here, so 20 past midnight Sydney time...

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GraphJam

2008-07-25T17:05:00.005+10:00

I've been looking about on GraphJam of late, laughing at the endless pop culture references and such that can be turned into official looking graphs.

Here's are a few of my own.

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The Pope and The Dope

2008-07-21T09:57:00.005+10:00

First to The Pope...

We've just come out of a thing called World Youth Day here in Sydney. World Youth Week is probably a more correct moniker though, as it did seem to extend for more than a simple Day.

From dozens of youths gathered at bus stops about my area, climbing onto buses with scraps of paper with billet addresses on them, to the posters on every church, school and spare skerrick of advertising space, World Youth Day has been going for months really. The Pope came in on Thursday, staying at a nice little Opus Dei centre, before partaking of his duties and celebrations.

Road closures started on the Saturday night for the Sunday mass at Randwick Racecourse, something the punters and horse-folk alike had been lamenting, fighting, and ultimately compensated for. Out of Government coffers, of course. You can’t expect the Catholic Church to pay for putting other people out. The Pope said mass for the masses, and this morning was leaving the country bound for...some other place.

This morning the deputy Premier was stating on the radio that the whole thing was a 'huge success', as the images of Sydney would have gained worldwide exposure amongst the Catholic world. The airport is expecting a very busy day as thousands of pilgrims fly out, not bothering to look around at the city and its environs after coming for mass. I fail to see how it’s boosted our image. I'm sorry, but if you didn’t know where Sydney was, or seen any images of it prior to coming for WYD, then you aren’t likely to come for any other reason.

I wonder how much of a windfall WYD has been for the state? The Church asks the state to shut a racecourse for them, compensate the people put out by the event, had roads closed and traffic diverted, and no doubt put one heck of a bulge in the infrastructure.

If you're one of the richest organisations in the world, can't you be expected to pay for the cost of mounting some of the event?

The splinter groups and outsiders wanted a say, and it seems the church is a veritable goldmine for controversy. The 'annoying pilgrims' law that was passed created a fair hoo-ha, but doesn’t seem to have been used, except maybe a few odd times. The pictures on the news of three people dressed as giant condoms handing out condoms in a churchyard was a little overt. And the sexual abuse groups demanded the Pope's personal apology for the previous sins of the church-appointed priests. You can’t be responsible for everyone in your organisation, and there comes a time when you've just got to distance yourself from some people. You can apologise, but you wont undo what others have wrought. If your faith is that strong, then be assured that the abuser is bound for downstairs, and your own selves, by forgiveness, are going to the man up top with all haste.

And now for The Dope...

The Tour de France is on again, and entering week two we've already had four or five guys busted for EPO in various states. One team has withdrawn because of it, after winning three stages in their colours. Another is down to 4 riders through doping and injury.

But, that said, its still exciting to watch the guys you believe are clean. An Australian, Cadel Evans, leading for a handful of days. Another Australian, Simon Gerrans, winning a stage overnight. A Manxman winning 4 stages in one edition through a thunderous turn of pace. Frenchmen, Italians, Australians, Spaniards and Belgians all out front, showing the international flavour the race enjoys.

A loose crank arm derailed my own Tour de Parkway on Sunday afternoon. It makes me wonder how much these guys train, and the array of doctors and legal drug assistance that the riders have to make the 21-stage race in the times they do. Sure, anyone can ride for 6 hours, even through some discomfort, but to do it at the speeds they do, and for 21 days out of 23 is an amazing feat.

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Song of the Week

2008-07-02T16:24:00.003+10:00

Been a while...

We Care A Lot
Faith No More

We care a lot
about disasters, fires, floods and killer bees
about the NASA shuttle falling in the sea
about starvation and the food that Live Aid bought
about disease, baby Rock, Hudson, rock, yeah!

Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it

We care a lot
about the gamblers and the pushers and the geeks
about the smack and crack and whack that hits the street
about the welfare of all the boys and girls
about you people cause we're out to save the world

Yeah!

Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Said, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it

We care a lot
about the army, navy, air force and marines
about the NY, SF and LAPD
We care a lot
about you people
We care a lot
about your guns
We care a lot
about the wars you're fighting gee that looks like fun

We care a lot
about the Garbage Pail Kids, they never lie
about Transformers cause there's more than meets the eye
about the little things, the bigger things we top
about you people yeah you bet we care a lot

Yeah!

Said its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Said its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it

Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it
Oh, its a dirty job but someones gotta do it

Oh, its a dirty song but someons gotta sing it now

Catch the live performance from the Hordern Pavillion in Sydney from 21 October, 1997. How can I be sure? I was there.

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I had a good weekend

2008-06-30T13:34:00.004+10:00

I did. Really.

I didnt know I was going to, but it turned out to be a good one.

Saturday morning we take Little Lady and The Boy to swimming lessons. I get in with LL, The Boy goes off with the swimming instructor and learns while the Good Lady Wife and Offshoot #3 watch on from the sidelines (does a pool have sidelines?) We got home and had a brief play on the jumping castle we borrowed from friends. Once that excitement wore off, it was about lunchtime, then the sandpit was open for business.

The sandpit work continued unabated while I did a couple of running repairs to a bike. Naturally, Little Lady got curious, and knocked it over, but not onto herself. So, a fresh little scratch on the brake lever (courtesy the ground) and a nodding head as I said "please dont touch" was all that resulted. By this time Offshoot #3 was not doing what her programming was telling her, and I bundled her into the stroller for a walk of epic proportions. For me, anyway. I havent walked so far for ages.

Surprising even myself. I had a destination and a task, and it was half an hour before I was there. That done, I thought we may as well walk further afield. By the time we pulled up to watch the rugby at the end of the street we'd been gone an hour and a half. Constantly walking, aside from 5 minutes at the bike shop. I guess its good conditioning for my overseas trip. #3 decided to wake up from being still for more than 0.3 of a second, so after 5 minutes of watching the rugby, we left. The other two didnt get up till after we got home, so #3 went for a feed while we performed the 5pm Ritual.

The 5pm Ritual consists of The Boy asking "Is it 5 o'clock yet? Can I watch a movie?" If so, yes. If not, he waits, begrudgingly.

Dinner, shower, bed for the Offshoots. Watched the Wallabies beat the French in the rugby that night. Saturday: gone.

Sunday was an early start for a bike ride, my first time out for a few weeks. Oddly enough we had the full complement of four riders for our run, which is a rarity in the cold weather, and since #3 came into the world. I stuck it out with the quicker two for much of the run, falling off towards the end in both directions. Aside from a mishap with a ground peg and four coffees by one of the others, a nice ride and a pleasant enough morning once the sun got serious about 7:30. Starting from the beach at 6:30am in winter is rather cool.

The Boy and I went to see Kung Fu Panda after that. Tai Lung scared him a little, but he got past that, and enjoyed the film. As did I. It was awesome to hear Jackie Chan's voice in it. We picked up a couple of things at the shopping centre and went home to find a quiet house. The Boy reluctantly had a sleep, while #3 decided to do a Saturday and not sleep. It worked yesterday, why shouldnt it work today? For a half hour it did, and we walked down to the supermarket to get milk and bread.

#3 started the vocals in the line at the checkout, and continued till we got home, thirty minutes later. I'm sure I got a few sympathetic looks as I passed people on the way home. A feed helped, as it generally does, and #3 drifted out till quite late that night.

Dinner out with the Offshoots, Good Lady plus 4 of the in-laws was nice, even if Little Miss Contrary did act up a bit.

Home, Offshoots in bed, Good Lady in bed with #3 out of it. Sunday: gone.

I had a good weekend.

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STUFF! (that looks like other stuff*): Part 4

2008-06-24T10:22:00.004+10:00

With great delight I present Part 4 of...

STUFF!(that looks like other stuff)*

You know it's one of those mornings when your coffee growls at you.

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*A shamelessly stolen idea, thanks Ben.

Those wacky Japanese!

2008-06-17T20:26:00.003+10:00

The Boy got a box of biscuits from his great-Aunt when she came back from holiday in Japan recently.

I just had to share.

If the front wasn't enough, the side spreads the love even further.

And I'm just not sure about what's going on with this character.

In honour of the box I call them Super Happy Pants Biscuits.

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Countdown!

2008-06-12T11:20:00.000+10:00

Offshoot #3

2008-05-27T14:59:00.002+10:00

Saturday it happened. The Good Lady and I went to the hopsital early in the morning, after dealing with a rather upset Offshoot #1, not wanting his mum to go away. Offshoot #2 was fine, both having a brief blub after we left and they sat down to breakfast with Nanna.

The Doc induced #3 for fears of not getting to the hospital, and the fears were well founded. Once things got serious, it was barely two hours from contractions to arrival. Not enough time for me to get home from work (35 minutes on a good run, 1 hour on a bad run), get sorted, and get back to the hospital (which is 5 minutes from work).

Offshoot #3 arrived and pronounced well and good shortly after midday.

I went home about 4 hours later and told #1 and #2, and we all went back the morning after to see the newest clan member. The other kids were great, and we'll see if they keep it up once #3 comes home.

So we've all had a few days to get used to the idea of 3 kids, and prepare somewhat for the onslaught over the next few months juggling three balls of muscle and willpower.

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Ross Gittins and the Age of Enlightenment

2008-05-21T12:19:00.004+10:00

Ross Gittins is a man I like to read, quite a bit. He's very stable and forthright, which probably annoys the bleeding hearts and upper-crust toffs no end, especially when he bangs on about a subject like the incoming means-testing for the one-off baby bonus and on-going Family Tax Benefit (can I get any more "-" in that sentence - sure!).

Read here.

A sublime intellingence and an accurate interpretation of what it all means gives a strong article that tells it like it is. Personal opinion hasnt over-run the meaning, and I bet a few readers are sitting back thinking "he might be onto something, but that doesnt mean I have to like it". As it should make people think.

The key parts of this article I found are these:

"Figures updated from the official Household, Income and Labour Dynamics in Australia survey show that, for 2008-09, the median income of "households" will be about $80,000 a year before tax. And households earning $150,000 or more - starting at almost twice the median - are in the top 15 per cent of households."

OK, owning up time. Our household income will be less than the median this year, and probably for a few years to come. So means testing doesnt affect me. Thats not to say we need the bonus. We eat, we play, we live, we rent, we're not about to all die of starvation and poverty. So if our income was double, what is $5000 in the scheme of things? Answer: nothing. To jump up and down about unfairness if you're earning that much is plain greed and/or bollocks.

"Third, most people manage to keep themselves dissatisfied with their income by always comparing themselves with people who have more and never with people who have less (who, remember, they rarely see up close)."

"Fourth, a lot of people on high incomes keep themselves in a perpetual state of feeling they're having trouble making ends meet by increasing their spending commitments in line with every increase in their income."

I'm betting these are two things everyone does. Comparison to those better off is inevitable. Comparison to those who have less is rare, but more enlightening as to your current status I'd wager.

The fourth point is an excellent one. And in this time of interest free department store deals on everything under the sun, its only getting worse. So you stack up debt that you can "handle", then one bill increases (usually the most important one, the home loan), and suddenly its very sparse at the disposable income end. The non-essential bills get ignored, you sell the second or third car, you get a personal loan to cover store debts, and it all spirals.

The new residential morning mantra: "Grant me the willpower to resist interest free things I dont really need to survive..."

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If this is what it takes to dope...

2008-05-21T11:45:00.003+10:00

...I dont think I could ever do it.

Victor Conte, the man from BALCO and the focus of the big "drugs in sport" investigation in the US that has claimed more than a few athletics stars reputations, outlined in a letter the regime that sprinter Dwain Chambers was using when he got caught out in 2003.

Link.

The letter is as follows:

Dear Dwain,

Per your request, this letter is to confirm I am willing to assist you in providing UK Sport and others with information that will help them to improve the effectiveness of their anti-doping programs.

The specific details regarding how you were able to circumvent the British and IAAF anti-doping tests for an extended period of time are provided below.

Your performance enhancing drug program included the following seven prohibited substances: THG, testosterone/epitestosterone cream, EPO (Procrit), HGH (Serostim), insulin (Humalog), modafinil (Provigil) and liothryonine, which is a synthetic form of the T3 thyroid hormone (Cytomel).

THG is a previously undetectable designer steroid nicknamed "the clear." It was primarily used in the off season and was taken two days per week, typically on Mondays and Wednesdays. Generally, these were the two most intense weight-training days of the week. The purpose was to accelerate healing and tissue repair. Thirty units (IU) of the liquid was place under the tongue during the morning time-frame. THG was used in cycles of "three weeks on and one week off."

Testosterone/epitestosterone cream was also primarily used during the off season. It was rubbed into the skin on the front of the forearm two days per week, typically Tuesdays and Thursdays. The dosage was ½ gram which contained 50mg of testosterone and 2.5mg of epitestosterone (20 to 1 ratio). The purpose was to offset the suppression of endogenous testosterone caused by the use of the THG and to accelerate recovery. The testosterone/epitestosterone cream was also used in cycles of three weeks on and one week off.

EPO was used three days per week during the "corrective phase", which is the first two weeks of a cycle. Typically, it was on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. It was only used once per week during the "maintenance phase" thereafter, typically this was every Wednesday. The dosage was 4,000 IU per injection. The purpose was to increase the red blood cell count and enhance oxygen uptake and utilization. This substance provides a big advantage to sprinters because it enables them to do more track repetitions and obtain a much deeper training load during the off season. EPO becomes undetectable about 72 hours after subcutaneous injection (stomach) and only 24 hours after intravenous injection.

HGH was used three nights per week, typically on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Each injection would contain 4.5 units of growth hormone. Once again, this substance was used primarily during the off season to help with recovery from very strenuous weight training sessions.

Insulin was used after strenuous weight training sessions during the off season. Three units of Humalog (fast-acting insulin) were injected immediately after the workout sessions together with a powdered drink that contained 30 grams of dextrose, 30 grams of whey protein isolates and 3 grams of creatine. The purpose was to quickly replenish glycogen, resynthesize ATP and promote protein synthesis and muscle growth. Insulin acts as a "shuttle system" in the transport of glucose and branch chain amino acids. There is no test available for insulin at this time.

Modafinil was used as a "wakefulness promoting" agent before competitions. The purpose was to decrease fatigue and enhance mental alertness and reaction time. A 200mg tablet was consumed one hour before competition.

Liothryonine was used help accelerate the basic metabolic rate before competitions. The purpose was to reduce sluggishness and increase quickness. Two 25mg tablets were taken one hour before competition. There is no test available for liothryonine at this time.

In general terms, explosive strength athletes, such as sprinters, use anabolic steroids, growth hormone, insulin and EPO during the off season. They use these drugs in conjunction with an intense weight training program, which helps to develop a strength base that will serve them throughout the competitive season. Speed work is done just prior to the start of the competitive season.

It is important to understand it is not really necessary for athletes to have access to designer anabolic steroids such as THG. They can simply use fast-acting testosterone (oral as well as creams and gels) and still easily avoid the testers. For example, oral testosterone will clear the system in less than a week and testosterone creams and gels will clear even faster.

Many drug-tested athletes use what I call the "duck and dodge" technique. Several journalists in the UK have recently referred to it as the "duck and dive" technique. This is basically how it works.

First, the athlete repeatedly calls their own cell phone until the message capacity is full. This way the athlete can claim to the testers that they didn't get a message when they finally decide to make themselves available. Secondly, they provide incorrect information on their whereabouts form. They say they are going to one place and then go to another. Thereafter, they start using testosterone, growth hormone and other drugs for a short cycle of two to three weeks.

After the athlete discontinues using the drugs for a few days and they know that they will test clean, they become available and resume training at their regular facility.

Most athletes are tested approximately two times each year on a random out-of -competition basis. If a tester shows up and the athlete is not where they are supposed to be, then the athlete will receive a "missed test". This is the equivalent to receiving "strike one" when up to bat in a baseball game. The current anti-doping rules allow an athlete to have two missed tests in any given eighteen-month period without a penalty or consequence. So, the disadvantage for an athlete having a missed test is that they have one strike against them. The advantage of that missed test is the athlete has now received the benefit of a cycle of steroids. Long story short, an athlete can continue to duck and dive until they have two missed tests, which basically means that they can continue to use drugs until that time.

In summary, it's my opinion that more than fifty percent of the drug tests performed each year should be during the off season or the fourth quarter. This is when the track athletes are duckin' and divin' and using anabolic steroids and other drugs. Let me provide some rather startling information for your consideration. If you check the testing statistics on the USADA website, you will find that the number of out-of-competition drug tests performed during each quarter of 2007 are as follows: in the first quarter there were 1208, second quarter 1295, third quarter 1141 and in the fourth quarter there were only 642.

In late 2003 I advised USADA about the importance of random testing during the fourth quarter of the year. They did initially seem to follow my advice because they increased the number of fourth-quarter tests in 2004, 2005 and 2006.

However, they failed to continue this practice in 2007. Why would USADA decide to perform only 15% of their annual out-of-competition tests during the fourth quarter? Let's not forget that this is the off season before the upcoming summer Olympic Games. This is equivalent to a fisherman knowing that the fish are ready to bite and then consciously deciding that it is time to reel in his line and hook, lean his fishing pole up against a tree and take a nap.

On several occasions, I have provided detailed information to both USADA and WADA in an attempt to help them establish more effective testing policies and procedures.

I certainly have more information that I would like the opportunity to provide to you and UK Sport, but I will leave that for another time.

Hopefully, this information will be helpful and I am available to assist you further upon request.

Yours sincerely,

Victor Conte

Pretty serious stuff. I wonder what sort of impact on fitness or recovery it would have had if you missed an injection or timetable for a particular drug? The majority of the drugs appear to be recovery aids more than boosting performance. Still, if the recovery is faster, you can train harder or longer, and the effects are reduced, and that still classifies as a performance enhancement.

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The spreading use of the photo

2008-05-21T09:18:00.002+10:00

I came across a few links on a news story the other day to a couple of great sites.

ManBabies.com

YoungMe/NowMe

Give them a look. The ManBabies is a bit bizarre, but once you get used to it, it's pretty funny. YoungMe/NowMe is great, and I'm thinking of digging up a couple of my old photos to re-create.

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Back in, back on, back around...

2008-05-19T13:57:00.005+10:00

Hola Amigos

I know its been a while since I rapped at ya, but a lot has been going on. Some of it not enforced, rather of my own choosing, but some of it has been taking time simply because thats the way life goes.

We're waiting for Offshoot #3 to get her head into the world any day now. Yes, a girl. That'll be 1 + 2. Me and the Boy will be outnumbered for years to come. I think the Good Lady is keen to get it over with, too. In between sorting out arrangements, getting things ready, and trying to wrangle #1 and #2, there's not a whole lot of time left for much else. Still, it'll all be over in 18 years or so.

I missed a couple of rides in the last month, but got out early on a cold sunday morning yesterday expecting to meet up with the semi-regular group I ride with. I got the to usual start point to find nobody there, not even the car or ute that a couple of the guys drive down in. I figured I'd take the chance to cover some more ground than usual, so I rode an out and back of the route below. I had to break out the heavyweight jersey and the long knicks (with 3/4 leg warmers underneath). Very Fame!, except that you couldn't see them and they're not wool. I wasnt hot at all, which might tell you how cool it started.

Dee Why to McCarrs (lower tollbooth)

Share your bike routes @ Bikely.com

It's got a few hills in the last 1/3 of the trip out, which were nice, given the cooler weather and lack of people. I think the cold kept a few away, as it wasnt till I was nearly back at the beach that I saw the normal amount of people and mid-sized groups heading out. By the time I got back to home, and looped the block a couple of times to make up the numbers, I'd cracked 50km in under 2 hours. The normal sunday is 36km + coffee, which makes up 2 hours or close to. The legs felt a little dead for half a day, but a good sleep and I actually feel I could do it again, perhaps a little slower.

Still no car, and not much chance to look. It's going to have to happen soon though, otherwise I'm going to be caught severely short in days to come I reckon.

Naturally I've been outraged at news items and inspired by reading other peoples blogs, but they're just not as important at the moment.

One blogger that is worth mentioning is the Fat Cyclist. Fatty's wife is going through cancer, and things is grim over Fatty's way. But he's putting a spin on it and opening up to his readers, who are opening hearts, wallets and minds to him and his family in return.

Best of luck Fatty and Susan. Your blog provides an insight into a family going through something I would never wish to go through, yet you do it with style, finesse and a refreshing take on the matter.

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Christians just cant help it, can they?

2008-04-24T10:13:00.003+10:00

The christians are at it again. Like they ever stopped. Or ever will stop. Yet another event has caused me to bang on about the christian materials and the general public.

The scenario: there's a guy standing on a corner handing out books. He thrusts one towards me "Here, a novel we wrote". We? OK, why not. One thing about the bus is you need reading material. "All we ask is a silver coin to help with costs" he says. Sure, I had a 20c coin, I give it to him. "Thanks, have a good afternoon" he says. I put it in my back pocket and drop it on my desk at work. An hour later, one of my work colleagues comes up and flips it open. "Its a bit God" he says. What? What is? He points to the book.

I open it and flip through it. So it is. The christians have done it again. I'm sure people like Robert Ludlum, Michael Crichton, etc, etc, all have religious views, yet they can put them aside and just write a good story. Sure, its a case of one bad egg spoiling the box, but come on. Give the rest of us a break. Just because we dont go to church and clap and wave with the rest of you doesnt mean we want it forced onto us.

Upon flicking through and reading a few pages, this 'author' has basically re-written the Bible. The hero even rises from the dead after 3 days at the end.

If you're going to spread the message, at least get imaginitive.

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Wheels, baby, wheels...

2008-04-21T09:03:00.004+10:00

Hola amigos.

I know its been a while since I rapped at ya, but not much has been happening to tell the truth. Nothing of much note, just living as best I can manage with the Good Lady and the Offshoots and working a bit more than normal.

I've been sans car for four weeks now, and its going alright. I'm bussing it to work with the unwashed masses, which is taking about the same amount of time as driving. And iys easier once I get to the office as I can just leave the driver to park it for me instead of crawling around having to find a space for the day.

I test drove a Mitsubishi Mirage on saturday that I'd spotted, which turned out to be a bit underwhelming in all respects. A bit wishy-washy with throttle response, a faint smell of smoker inside, and a bit floaty steering wise. It sure wouldnt win any performance contests in its current guise. Maybe I've been spoiled with my last vehicle, which had more power and torque, and definitely more character.

So the search goes on. It better hurry, as the Good Lady is due with Offshoot #3 within a month, and without a car I'm just asking for trouble.

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Of Mice and Men

2008-03-26T09:11:00.004+11:00

Two nights ago I was sitting on my lounge soundly beating The Hustler on Tiger Woods 2005 on the PlayStation 2 when a little dark shape ran between the side of the lounge and the box of children's books against one wall, a distance of about two feet.

At first I thought "cockroach". They are a common enough occurence in themselves when the power of the roach baits begins to fade. I made a note to change them soon. I birdied the next hole to go 2 up, and lined up the next drive off the tee.

The shape travelled back the other way. Quickly. It was too quick to be a cockroach.

"Ah, no...mouse..." I said. I looked under the couch. No sign of him. No surprise.

I went up to bed after winning 4&3 over The Hustler, and mentioned it to the Good Lady. She has an inherit distaste of mice, having lived with mouse problems during her teenage years. I, however, dont mind them so much. Of course, they are to be dealt with at the earliest opportunity.

After work yesterday, I scouted for my two mouse traps, loading them up with peanut butter and leaving one under each of our two lounges. I checked them as I went to bed a few hours later after I'd given Stuart Appleby a lesson at St. Andrews and taken him for a $60,000 side wager. Both traps were there. Waiting.

This morning, as I got ready to catch the bus to work, I thought "I'll just check my traps". Grab my torch. Look under one couch. Trap still waiting. Look under the other couch.

Trap is gone.

Not set off. No mouse. Gone. Completely. This is interesting.

I look around under the rest of the lounge. Not here.

So, the mouse has gotten caught somehow, and wandered off with the trap attached. Last time I used this trap the mouse didnt even know what hit him. How am I going to find this in the five minutes I've got before I have to leave? I didnt really want the Offshoots or the Good Lady finding it amongst the toys on the floor. I had a quick look and couldnt see it, so I gave up. I went to the kitchen and packed my bag, dropping it by the door.

Then I heard it. The sound of metal being scratched at. Little mousey claws. Luckily there was only one thing metal on the floor. A tin lunch box. Open.

"Why is that lid so far off the ground? If its open, it usually hangs down further..." I crouched and looked. Here was my mouse. Front foot trapped, struggling to drag the device.

Still alive. Still struggling. I wasnt about to put him in the freezer, like they do with cane toads.

"Right...outside!" I picked up the trap, the mouse hanging from it swinging wildly as he thrashed about mousily. His leg didnt look great, but he wasnt protesting. I took him into the yard, unclipped the trap and he fell into the garden, bounding off rapidly as he tasted freedom. Broken leg or not, he wasnt being hampered by it.

I went upstairs and related the tale to the Good Lady who reacted with "well he'd better not come back in!" The mouse is free, the other trap is there, rest easy.

I dont usually like to kill animals that wander into the house. Spiders get left, if they're harmless or not near the Offshoots. The big, ugly or dangerous ones get stomped, sprayed, or a combination thereof. Cockroaches are fair game any time you see them, though. So I've let a mouse free, and I guess I've got to be careful to shut the inside garage door. Either that or the Offshoots have to be more careful about dropping food on the floor when they're watching television.

One mouse free = a thousand in six months? If he gets that far. There's a few cats near us, and him with a gammy leg.

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A personal slant on NBA history

2008-03-14T11:37:00.008+11:00

I've been prowling YouTube for NBA videos from the time when I was playing a lot of basketball at school and watching the games we'd get telecast on the ABC in Australia the night after they'd played. 1989-1990 in particular developed a regular friday night routine. The weekly game with my school team, come home, shower, eat, and wait till 10pm or so for the NBA game to come on.

Some of the games were classics that people talk about. It was the Detroit "Bad Boys" era; the Jordan/Pippen Bulls; the end of the Lakers "Showtime" era of Magic, Worthy, Green, etc; the closing seasons for Celtics legends like Bird, McHale, & Parrish; the Spurs with David Robinson; Barkley at the 76ers coming close time after time; Larry Johnson and Muggsy Bogues at the Hornets; Dominique Wilkins; Clyde the Glide at Portland; its a long list.

Here's a few of the videos I really enjoyed...

John Stockton

I wanted to be John Stockton. The man had the ball on a string. Or a rubber band to be more precise. Of course, he had Karl Malone to feed to time and time again. "Stockon...to Malone...basket" was a commentary track that they could've had on tape and just pressed a button everytime they were on a fast break. And like Hoopedia says: "As Stockton giveth, he taketh away." A league leader in assists and steals, he had fast hands and the kind of skills I'd have loved to have. He always seemed to be the kind of player who knew his limitations. Running a fast break he'd never get high enough to dunk over a retreating forward, or maybe even a stronger guard. So, he'd look, sometimes without anyone realising, he just knew where his team mates were. Away would go the ball once the defence was in the air or out of position, and the points flowed. Always good to watch.

Charles Barkley

This was a guy I didnt get into much when I watched him play as when I was a teenager because I was always a guard. Now that I've played as a forward, I understand and appreciate this guy a whole lot more. Perhaps as a kid he was the guy you loved to hate, but you cant hate people who arent good at what they do. And Charles was good. The series of blocks he pulls off at about 1:25 in are amazing. I know its a highlight reel and all, but still, there's probably a whole lot more that didnt get featured. It's a shame Sir Charles didnt win a championship.

Magic Johnson

He didnt get that nickname by deed poll. Magic earned it. By the time I was watching enough of him, he'd been playing 6 or 7 years in the NBA. Showtime came about because Magic and the rest of the team were of like minds and skills. Behind the back, between the legs, no-look, inside, outside, upside-down, Magic could do it and make it stick as well as look easy. Los Angeles suited Showtime, and lapped it up. Other teams had the same skills, but couldnt or didnt add that flair to the game like Magic did.

Larry Bird

Larry always struck me as the dorky white guy. But he was a great player. If you needed a buzzer-beater, Larry was The Man. It was awesome to watch Celtics/Lakers matches where he and Magic were playing to see who won on the night. Of course, you cant have flair without a good base, and both Bird and Magic had incredibly solid base skills. Bird was no fuss, do what needed to be done, and celebrate later. Which he did with 3 Championships. The sight of Larry Bird laying on his stomach on a towel courtside while he was on the bench is enduring, the temporary remedy for his many late-career back problems.

The Bird/Magic story is a long one, and perhaps one of the best in NBA history. It started in the 1979 NCAA Championship and ended when Bird retired in October 1992. 1979, Michigan State, with Magic Johnson, beat an as yet undefeated Indiana State team with Larry Bird in the NCAA Final. 1992, Larry Bird retired with back problems. Magic retired for good in 1995.

There's a great list, "The 50 Greatest NBA Players", as named in October, 1996, and links to all the players here. Well worth a read if you're into basketball history.

Also, scour the YouTube 'related' tab if you want to take a walk across years of basketball talent, too.

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Alain has a point...

2008-03-13T12:51:00.003+11:00

I hate to say it Lewis, but Alain makes a valid point.

Read here.

This bit made me smile: Hamilton will partner Heikki Kovalainen at McLaren after the Finn and former dual world champion Fernando Alonso swapped seats, with the Spaniard returning to Renault. But he denied he would assume the role of No.1 driver.

"I don't see myself as a team leader, I feel I have a responsibility, as does Heikki, and we have equal responsibility in driving the team forward," Hamilton said.

I wonder who will complain if Heikki outpoints Lewis. He might leave it to his dad or the British press. I'm sure the Spanish will be laughing if it happens.

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Bernie rides again

2008-03-12T12:38:00.001+11:00

F*** off, Bernie Ecclestone.

Read here.

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Cyanide and Happiness comics

2008-03-07T11:42:00.000+11:00

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net
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25 basis points

2008-03-05T14:01:00.001+11:00

The official cash interest rate has just risen in Australia, again. And, yet again, the bleating and wailing and gnashing of teeth has begun.

Surely, and I profoundly hope this is the case, people are not so stupid that they would truly believe that interest rates would remain at record lows for more than 5 years.

Take a simple example: in the last 25 years, interest rates have gone from above 15% to below 6%. If you consider the majority of home loans are calculated to run a course of 25 to 30 years, why would you not consider rate rises and their impact on your payments?

The number of people who jumped into a large house with a mammoth mortgage over the lean rate period was massive. The ads were targeting everyone at every turn. There were an abundance of ads for no-deposit loans, low deposit loans, no background check loans, etc, etc. It was a blanket of advertising all aimed at one thing. Home ownership.

While this is not a uniquely Australian ideal, it certainly seemed to be taken to a new level over here throughout the last decade or two. Now, the halo seems to be slipping on the home ownership angel.

The mass sell-off of “toys” has been an indication. Sales of boats, jet-skis, vehicles, recreational machinery, and motorbikes have all been on the increase. People cant afford to run these items and meet the mortgage. Something gives, and its normally the ‘fun’ side of things.

I wonder what the suicide and divorce rate will do now.

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Crossover!

2008-03-03T16:36:00.002+11:00

There's some people out there who take crossovers to new heights.

Take these guys, for example.

A 5000-watt soundsystem on a BMX?

Sweet.

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Super Sunday in Sydney with a visit from the Queen(s)

2008-02-25T11:30:00.009+11:00

Like a great many Sydney-siders, your erstwhile correspondent and his good lady wife headed for the harbour on the fine sunny afternoon that was Sunday February 24.

Unlike many others, we were there for a wedding and reception at Pier One, which is located just to the west of the southern end of the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Many on the train we caught to the city were headed for the A-League football grand final, as well as some late arrivals for the one-day cricket match between Australia and India. A fair portion were heading for the harbour foreshores to see the Queen Victoria and QE2 sail by each other in an historic moment.

Never again in Australian waters will you see this happen...

The new Queen Victoria (right) sails past the Queen Elizabeth II.

The Queen Victoria is on its maiden world voyage, whilst the QE2 is on its final voyage before retirement. The two ships will never again share Australian territorial waters.

Watching something as massively large as the Queen Victoria move slowly from the mooring at Circular Quay was something to behold. As it moved backwards, the whole slab side of the ship looming above the concourses below, the sheer size and scale of it was daunting.

I personally feel the QE2 is a more stylish vessel, with the increased bow rake and styled top decking area. Aside from the dark colour scheme and red line, if it were painted white, the Queen Victoria could be any other cruise ship, when viewed from the sea. I'm sure the internal appointments are of a far higher standard than you would find aboard a lesser holiday cruise ship, though.

The wedding was great, the night was enjoyable, seeing the ships was an added bonus. Now I can say I've seen a once in a lifetime sight.

For one woman, the day ended quite abruptly. It appears she was out taking photos of the Queen Victoria and toppled over a balcony to her unfortunate demise below. I've read no news on it, so I dont know more than speculation, and the fact that we walked past the scene of the incident where a sheet-covered body lay in the middle of the footpath underneath the balcony. Some things are worth seeing, but not putting yourself at risk.

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Whoever designed the new Subaru WRX needs to be…

2008-02-08T14:57:00.003+11:00

…strapped down, like Malcolm McDowell in ‘A Clockwork Orange’, with devices holding their eyes open, while they watch slides of stylish vehicles morph into hideous shapeless lumps of metal.

- Malcolm gets re-educated

Then they can watch them in reverse, and re-educate themselves about industrial design that belies the true nature of a car with the heritage (albeit short) of the Subaru Impreza WRX.

Even the first model we received in Australia in the mid-1990’s, with the flat bonnet and boot lid, slab sides and slightly pushed guards was a better looking car. The second model we got was an improvement on this again.

- First generation Australian WRX

They got fairly wide acclaim too as a fire-breather.

- Victorian and NSW police got a few

And although the last model looked like a Hyundai Excel when Wheels magazine released ”spy pictures”, once Subaru refined it the WRX came out looking like a rocket sled, and went like one too.

- Latest generation Australian WRX

Somewhat reminiscent of the change of the Skyline model from R32 to R33, the new Subaru looks vastly dull by comparison. The R32 Skyline was an angular, angry car, true to its nature. It was no bespoke weapon, it just was a weapon. And it looked like it.

- R32: weapon, R33: overblown pig, R34: style and power

The Skyline maintains a constant design feature that WRX has yet to decide on. You know what this is, without even reading a badge.

- Iconic round taillights

So too the last two WRX incarnations, but not this one. Granted, a weapon it is, but it will hardly cause anyone walking past it parked at the shops to stop and stare at it, wondering if it goes like a scalded cat. Its just another bland hatchback with a scoop plugged onto the front. The insipid downward curve of the bonnet towards the drooping grille line, the streaky headlights perhaps the strong point, yet the whole front end is nowhere near the strong face of previous models.

- WRX old/new comparison

Even in STI guise, it’s not a patch on the last model. You want a car like this to flex its muscles, not wear a cheap suit. Aside from the flared guards and slightly wider look, its not really a visually intimidating vehicle. Give the car a tail, that should help in making it look threatening even if its not even moving. The new WRX lacks all of these things.

- new WRX STI, horror story in 3D

A car of this nature needs to grin, to bare its teeth, and not just smile sweetly. Or maybe even stick its nose in where its not wanted.

- Noses. Is the new WRX really as good as any of these?
(left to right: Audi A4, BMW M3, Mistubishi Lancer, Honda Odyssey, Aston Martin DB5)

Even the Honda Odyssey looks better coming up behind you than the new WRX.

Ricers of the world are probably celebrating. At last, with their Honda Civic’s and Toyota Corolla’s and Yaris/Echo’s, with fake scoops and bodywork, they now have a car that can actually look better than the WRX. Even the Civic, a car very easily over-riced with even minimal work, can look better than the WRX.

- Riced out Civic: better looker

You want better looking cars? Mazda 3 for one, and the MPS widens the gap. Ford Focus is another, especially in XR5 guise. The Holden Astra Coupe also beats it in the design stakes.

- top to bottom: Mazda 3 MPS: Ford Focus XR5: Holden Astra SRi

Ford, Mazda, Holden and Honda are producing vehicles with consistent noses at the moment, aside from a few exceptions. The Impreza nose doesn’t keep consistent with any of the other Subaru models, and I hope they don’t change the Liberty/Legacy nose to suit the Impreza. That would be a crime.

- left to right, top to bottom:
Ford Focus, Mondeo, Falcon
Holden Astra, Vectra, Commodore,
Subaru Liberty, Outback, Forrester

At least Subaru gave the horrid Tribeca a facelift recently to bring it more into line with the rest of the range, style-wise.

- Tribeca, god-awful to something far better

I hope they weren’t trying to toughen up the nose. It hasn’t worked. Some examples of tough noses:

- left to right: BMW M3: Aston Martin DB6: Honda Integra Type R: Mistubishi Lancer Evolution IX: Ford Mondeo: Toyota Corolla: Toyota Aurion: Aston Martin DB9: Honda Prototype: McLaren MP4-23

It’s saying a lot when the Toyota Corolla gets a mention above the WRX.

Naturally, all this is criticism from a personal point of view. Some of you may like it (as Mr. T would say, "I pity the fool!"). I don’t think it inspires confidence in its performance as much as it used to.

- Wheeeeeeee…..

When I see one do this and look as good, then I might change my mind. Until then, the Subaru design team can stay strapped into their chairs and watch industrial design loops.

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Please get off the Australian Coast

2008-02-08T09:34:00.000+11:00

If you live anywhere near the coast of Australia, and in particular the eastern coast, you will no doubt have noticed the stickers bearing place names with the tagline "somewhere on the australian coast" beneath. Avalon, in Sydney's northern beaches, for example:

This may actually have been the originating location in Australia for these stickers.

Of course there are some humorous larrikins who extend the range of these, and re-word the tagline to suit their town or place:

Rather.

And the version generally seen on utes and older model vehicles bearing P-plates:

Ah, yes. Tagline should read "inside this vehicle".

Usually with this sticker the person inside the vehicle fits the description, and drives accordingly.

There is one exception to this variation that is highly acceptable:

It's a unique Australian ability to be able to eat this stuff.

Driving to work the other morning I saw what is perhaps the ultimate corruption of the (until now) tolerable branding:

Please try to be more obscure, thats the one delight in these things!

Now, either someone has had this printed specifically, taken this model to America and marketed it, or we've knocked it off yet again. The fact that it is spelled with an accent leads me to believe the former. Only a non-New Yorker would spell New York this way. Sure, the New York accent as depicted is but a mere portion of New York, but hey, lets generalise.

Perhaps it is only a matter of time till these version appear on our shores:

Bought back by our latest Paris-Dakar competitor.

Hello Norway.

Ah, Estonia! Land of the massive 318m Suur Munamägi

Maybe they're already big in Europe. Maybe every Skoda in Estonia wears a Tallinn sticker.

Lastly, I leave you with the model I would like to see.

No, you cant put it on your Mercedes, thats the point.

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R.I.P. Sheldon Brown

2008-02-05T09:42:00.000+11:00

Reading a couple of my favoured blogs this morning to discover that a well-known and much-respected cyclist/advisor/general knowledge giver/expert had died over night in the US of a heart attack.

Sheldon Brown has probably give more useful and helpful advice than the majority of web-using cyclists combined. He forgot more than many of us even know.

His final post on bikeforums.net was just after 8:30 US time last night. Not long later he was sadly deceased.

R.I.P. Sheldon Brown. May you find all the "interchangeabilitude" your components deserve.

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Bernie's pursuit of a dollar

2008-02-03T11:57:00.000+11:00

So the Australian Formula One GP is set to be lost, with the contract 'unlikely' to be renewed past 2010.

Read.

The sooner Formula One ceases to be about Bernie and his mates lining their swelling pockets and more about providing an accessible series, the better off everyone will be.

The options of racing in India, Korea or Russia are interesting though. India may pull a crowd through sheer numbers. Korea? Again, same deal, though no Daewoo in the GP may hamper the fan base. Russia? They cant get to Germany, Austria, Hungary, Italy, Monaco, or Great Britain? There's enough tifosi in the world to provide support nearly anywhere, I suppose. Reason enough for Bernie to go there.

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Continuing the theme...

2008-01-30T13:09:00.000+11:00

I could spend a lot of time on this site:

icanhascheezburger.com

lolcats abound.

If you dont know what lolcat is, you're about to find out.

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Necessity is the mother...

2008-01-30T10:24:00.000+11:00

...of Invention.

And this is one heck of an 'invention'. Less an invention, strictly speaking, and more a niche that someone thought needed filling.

Cheeseburger in a can

Yes, cheeseburger. In a can.

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A quick take on the new Subaru WRX

2008-01-24T11:11:00.000+11:00

Take one (1) Mazda 3:

Add one (1) scoop:

Market the result:

Look for a longer critique coming soon.

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Bigger than Cheeses exploited!

2008-01-18T12:33:00.000+11:00

Knocked off from ED and exploited, but stolen first from Bigger than Cheeses.

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DRABCD!

2008-01-14T09:09:00.000+11:00

I had an interesting weekend.

On Saturday I attended a first aid course at a friends house with several other people, the first one I've ever done. As we all have young children, we dealt in the majority with potential situations that may arise with kids.

A most enlightening day, naturally. How to administer CPR, dealing with bleeding, broken bones, burns, bites and stings. All those typical kid-related injuries you might expect. Much of it had cross-over into adult treatment as well, the principles the same just scaled up or down to suit. The response acronym is a bit hard, but I guess we cant all have R.I.C.E. and H.A.R.M. to remember.

D.R.A.B.C.D. !!

Danger
Response
Airway
Breathing
CPR
Defibrillation

I dont know that we'll be going out to buy a defibrillator in a hurry though. If we had someone in the house at risk of cardiac problems or with serious issues, then yes, they'd be a very important item to have.

On Sunday I did 40km on the bike, just getting home before it really got hot and humid. Spent the whole ride chatting and thinking about "if that guy there falls off and breaks his arm, I know what to do now..."

I've been home alone since Wednesday, so got all the washing out of the way before I attacked anything else. By that time, though, it was really too hot to do anything else outside, and washing the car could wait. I moved the chainring on my single speed bike. Its definitely quieter now, so the 5 minute exercise was worthwhile.

The Sunday afternoon storm rolled in thick and quick, but not as much rain as I'd thought. Still, it took the humidity out of the air a bit and cleaned a bit of grime from roads and cars. Lucky I didnt wash it during the heat, cause it would've just been marked by the rain anyway.

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"I think it's my pump, doctor..."

2008-01-11T10:02:00.000+11:00

A little while ago I posted about a valve that I managed to pull from a tyre.

Well, I did it again on wednesday night.

I started out for a light half-hour or so breeze on one of my bikes after changing to a set of wheels that normally resides on my Sunday morning group road bike. Long story, there's two bikes and six wheels. They'd been sitting unused for a couple of weeks, and I forgot to check the tyre pressures before I went. I rode no more than a kilometre when I realise the back is down a little. No problem, I've got a pump on the bike, I can get it to 80PSI, enough for a quick ride.

Clip it on, flip the lever, start pumping. Something is wrong, oh so terribly wrong.

The tyre is inflating, slowly, but each time I stop it deflates just as slowly. Out via the valve. Unclip the pump to see that the head has actually bent the valve end and spindle that pokes out from the main valve body. Therefore, if you try and do it up, it deflates itself.

Picture (C) matthewsbikes.com

Yes, it SHOULD be straight, but it wasn't. More like 6 degrees of bend.

I limp home, reflecting that its been a recurring theme on this particular bike...limping at the end of Sydney Gong, limping home twice now. I use a pair of pliers to straighten the spindle. I put 100PSI in with the floor pump, and off I go. 40 minute ride without trouble.

Next morning, I glance into the garage to see the back tyre sitting pretty on the ground, somewhat spread. Again, no worries, I'll just hit it with the floor pump and get it back, leave the valve cap off and she'll be right, right?

Er, no. Every pump in equals a large hissing out. Its about then I realise that this valve has broken away from the tyre as well. Lucky it didnt happen on the road, but what would've done it? Pull it out last night after I got home from work, and sure enough the valve stem has ripped halfway around at the base.

The only thing consitent thing in both these has been the pump. It seems to take a fair bit of force to get it on, and it really rocks when you push it. I'll check the head is on the right way, but I'm sure it is. If so, then its not getting used again on road tyres, I'll save it for my mountain bike once I get it rebuilt and ready to roll. At least I can change the head to fit the schraders on the 26" wheels.

I dont think I'll use the little knurled rings on valves for a while either, till I see if that might be my problem. How tight should they be, after all? Too loose and they vibrate down and rattle. Too tight and it seems they assist in pulling tyres apart.

To top it all off, the back wheel on my road bike spontaneously burst last night out of the blue. I ripped the tube out, despite the late hour, to find a pinch flat not far from the valve. I'd had it trued five days ago, so I guess its been biding its time till now. Maybe it was the temperature rise that killed it. I dont think I can repair it, its too close to the stem. Its replaced now anyway, and Sunday will be a test to see if I get through without popping another one.

Just when you thought it couldn't get funnier, and to bring my 'bad luck in threes' back to reality, my rear 'commuter' wheel seem to have a problem at a spoke hole giving me a flat two weeks ago. Thats #3 for now. Let this be the end, please...

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Back at base, bugs in the software...

2008-01-11T09:38:00.000+11:00

I've been noticing recycled music coming up again as I flick across my radio dial, generally on the more R'n'B and pop contemporary music stations.

By recycled, I mean songs that were written and released between 10 and 20 years ago being re-recorded by new artists and handed off as new music. Sometimes they even put new words into the old music, but this is more than just sampling.

I guess this has happened before. The Beatles first release wasn't one of their songs. Many jazz and soul singers had 'standards'. If you didn't do 'Summertime', you weren't in the game. Big Bands did too, often performing the same songs as the next band, but having to back it up with flair and showmanship instead of relying on the passing of time to release a new song.

But these are not standards.

Trouble is, nowadays, anyone with a decent voice (not a great voice, there's a difference) can sing a song, have it digitally revised to be in pitch with the music, and release it to wide sales.

It will be interesting to see what music from today people decide some minimal-talent vocalist can recycle in 10 years time.

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Shell 'The Circuit' advertisement

2008-01-10T12:38:00.000+11:00

Another great ad...

You can download it here.

Turn it up.

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The Honda 'Impossible Dream' advertisement

2008-01-10T12:30:00.000+11:00

This is an excellent ad.

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Bjork

2008-01-08T13:34:00.000+11:00

I dont know what it is that intrigues me about this woman so much.

Whilst I find some of her songs annoying in the extreme, overall I find her work quite listenable. Maybe its her Icelandic appearance, and those cheekbones. She comes across as a bit of a scatterbrain in interviews, though maybe thats her english skills letting her down, because her singing is always clear.

I'd really like to meet her, maybe ask her a couple of questions. What they would be, I dont know. And I probably wouldn't know until I had the chance.

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Graphic design, photography and images galore

2008-01-08T13:28:00.000+11:00

Visit this site, right now.

If you dont get suckered into spending at least an hour following links to pictures, then there is no hope for you I'm afraid.

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And I thought only kids got it...

2007-12-19T11:19:00.000+11:00

On monday I developed a bit of a sore throat, and a lump on one side of my neck.

Yesterday I woke up (if you can call it that) unable to swallow without looking like I was eating fire, and with the side of my neck almost bulging out comically. I slid out of bed at 8am, then back in at 8:30am. I got up and went to the doctor at 11am, leaving with the diagnosis of 'tonsillitis'. Loaded up on anti-biotics, then went back to bed at 12:30, surfaced around 3pm for a few hours, then back in at 7:30 when my kids went to bed.

And I thought only kids got it...

Luckily its only on the right side, cause if this was on both sides, I'd be VERY hungry about now. Came to work today, I'll see how I go. Not sure how the office christmas lunch will go on friday, I might find myself home quite early this year.

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Time keeps on slipping...

2007-12-07T09:54:00.000+11:00

I’ve been doing some thinking lately on the concept of time. Not time, per se, as a passing of the inevitable, more time as a commodity that is saleable, irreplaceable and somewhat monetary in nature.

Naturally, time has always been associated with money in the investment world. You need only look at ‘short-term, high-risk’ strategies to understand that narrowing the time margin increases the risk margin, and vice versa. Should you attempt to make 5% return on investment (as opposed to 5% p.a.) in 3 months, your money will be subjected to a higher risk than a 5% return in 12 months. As the time extends, risk decreases. Never to a point where there is zero risk, though.

And what are you buying, when you purchase nearly any commodity? It can all be boiled down to time.

Say you buy a shirt. Break it into components.
- Raw materials
- Assembly
- Supply
- Sale

Raw materials:
Plastic buttons? Someone had to garner raw materials = time. Someone had to manufacture = time.
Cotton? Someone had to plant, tend, grow, harvest = time. Someone had to extract and form into thread = time. Someone had to supply to manufacturer = time.

Assembly:
Someone had to stamp buttons = time. Someone had to weave = time. Someone had to pattern, cut, stitch = time.

Supply:
Someone had to ship it to the store via truck, ship or air = time.

Sale:
Someone bought the material and manufacturing time in the form of completed buttons to put onto their garments, and woven cotton fabric to cut and sew into shirts = time.

Someone had to stand in the store to be there to attend to you during the sale = time.

So you’re buying more than the sum of its parts. You’re buying the equivalent of (possibly) hundreds of man-hours in production from raw material to sale, all for what you probably think is an outrageously high price. But think about it this way. If you had to go out, mine, farm, manufacture, ship and sell that same shirt, what would your charge out rate be?

For some, their time is cheap. By our standards. For others, they have deemed their time to be so valuable that they command thousands of dollars a day for their skill and knowledge. But lets see a barrister farm cotton to make his shirts, or wool to make his suits. Granted, his business is high risk, but why would the humble farmers business not be risk? His land floods, his crops fail, he has no livelihood. And it’s unlikely that he has a superannuation fund or investment as the barrister may.

Even if you’re reading this on a broadband internet connection, you’re buying someone’s time. ISP’s invest in technology, and what is technology but someone else’s time that they used to develop it? You invest in the speed of the network, removing a certain element of time from your day for other uses, or fitting more into the same amount of time.

There’s a lot of inequality in the world, and time is just another one of those. Sure, we all get 24 hours in a day no matter who or where we are, but for some people they demand they get more money for their utilisation of that time.

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STUFF! (that looks like other stuff*): Part 3

2007-12-06T16:40:00.000+11:00

With great delight I present Part 3 of...

STUFF!
(that looks like other stuff)*

No pictures from me or my scribes on this one, but another blog that contains some excellent examples of Stuff:

http://facesinplaces.blogspot.com/

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*A shamelessly stolen idea, thanks Ben.

STUFF! (that looks like other stuff*): Part 2

2007-11-22T09:12:00.000+11:00

With great delight I present Part 2 of...

STUFF!
(that looks like other stuff)*

Is it a tree? Is it a Mr. Grim, come about the reaping? You decide, with "Stump of Death":

Picture courtesy Miss Bunny

Secondly, a photograph entitled "Heart Shaped Pox":

Is it a sign of love abounding, or merely a blob of last night's dinner that got jettisoned onto the sink during the washing of dishes?

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*A shamelessly stolen idea, thanks Ben.

Take this quick quiz

2007-11-09T11:05:00.000+11:00

$4475.00

Dallas Dating

Sydney to the Gong 2007 full report

2007-11-07T21:16:00.000+11:00

2007 MS Sydney to the Gong Ride
November 4, 2007

5:45 Alarm

6:00 Leave house after getting dressed, eating a banana and staring at the cloud-filled sky and wet driveway for five minutes, thankful for loading bike in car the evening before

6:45 Park car in McEvoy Street, near the start, with about 50 other riders and families setting off

7:00 Ride the 2.4km to the start line, realising that there were many parking spaces much closer

Not the actual start line, but just over the hill. Very wet. Very rainy.

7:14 Ring dad to find him, no answer

7:15 Ring dad to find him on the opposite side of the building I was standing under

7:30 Set out in pouring rain to start line with dad & his regular ride mate John

7:45 Meet their other regular ride mate, Bill, after finding he’d already had one puncture pre-ride

7:50 Walk across start line

8:00 Finally get on bike in rain

8:01 First bottleneck

8:10 Get riding seriously, raining, easing and patches of blue starting to show already

8:30 Chain starts to skip, stiff link due to rain and grit

8:40 Stop to check chain, nothing I can do, push on

8:42 Hit sweet rhythm as we hit La Perouse, stiff link begins to ease as sun comes out

8:43 See first crash, mountain biker weaving in and out comes unstuck, nobody really stops

9:00 Stop to see Bill changing second flat for the day, Sutherland turn-off

9:30 Rest break at Loftus, bean-up

The steeds make it to Loftus in one piece and much dirtier.

10:10 Reach Waterfall and turn off main freeway, held at top of hill awaiting recovery of crashed rider #7 for the morning

10:15 Reach mid-point of descent as woman goes over side into bush at medium pace, no injury

10:20 Reach bottom, start climbing already

10:40 Lunch break at Cedar Flat

11:40 Leave lunch for climb out of National Park

12:10 Finish climbing out of National Park after passing lots of granny-geared MTB’ers

From the lookout atop the National Park climb. Note the eagle scouting for dead cyclists.

12:45 End of Seacliff Bridge for photo opportunity

South end of Seacliff Bridge.

12:55 Lift toppled lady off kerb and dad’s bike, try to loosen her pedal tension unsuccessfully, remount and start the final run

1:57 Get flat rear tyre, limp last 500m to finish with squeaky, bumpy rear wheel

2:00 Finish

2:30 Get back on bike to ride to adjacent sports facility to meet a friend for a ride to his place and warm shower

Trip computer:
86.4km
4:38:41 riding time
18.5km/h average
58.3km/h maximum speed

Polar HR monitor:
137bpm average HR
185bpm maximum HR
6:44:00 running time (includes stops)

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Dont you hate it when...

2007-11-06T13:34:00.000+11:00

...your bike suspension fights itself? Pay attention to spelling.

Their website has some pretty nifty gear on it though, aside from grammatical errors.

It's like all those bikes being peddled with 'peddles', as opposed to being peddled with pedals (or indeed, pedalled with pedals). Or those that come with a free German national. What Helmut thinks about being given away for free is anyone's guess.

Nitpick plus for today.

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Sydney Gong 2007 - brief report

2007-11-05T15:56:00.000+11:00

Finished.

86km showing on the computer

4:38 riding time

18.5km/h average

- all right where I thought the figures would be.

Numbers:

4 - stacks

1 - no-helmet fool

3 - kg backpack (with water)

4 - bottles consumed

1 - rainy start

1- warm, sunny finish

1 - flat tyre 500m from the end and no way I was changing it that close

too many - bikes that hadnt seen a spanner since last year

I'll enlighten you all more later.

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Three days to Sydney-Gong

2007-11-01T11:00:00.000+11:00

Three days out from Sydney to the Gong 2007 and I think everything is ready.

I took the flat bar out for a road test on monday night, and aside from a pinch-flat rear tyre, everything seems to be working well. No creaks, no undue noise, and no muscle/positional discomfort. The repaired chain took a bit of hill work without protest and no visible signs of expansion or stress. The bag is packed with tools, energy food and clothes.

Rain is forecast for sunday though. I've got a rain jacket tucked in the bag, and the bag has a rain cover, so aside from being uncomfortable, I should be right. The arrival and return plans are in place, and a 7:30 start at St. Peters beckons.

I can still smell tyre patch glue on my fingers from last nights repair job.

I must be ready.

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Got my shoes replaced

2007-10-31T10:21:00.001+11:00

A week or so ago I told you about my road cycling shoes coming apart.

I took them back to the store, who were only too happy to change them, saying that 1 in 100 carbon soled shoes comes back due to lifting of the sole plate. As the carbon is so stiff, the first thing to give it the bond between plate and shoe, rather than having any flex in the plate.

Big up to Pedals Plus at Mona Vale.

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Land of the free to do what you want even if its going to kill you

2007-10-31T10:11:00.000+11:00

For all the truck driving, tobacco chewing good old boys out there...no need to damage the environment by spitting out the windah's any more...someone has come up with a solution!

The MudJug

They also have these.

Dear lord, make it stop.

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I've said it before, and I'll say it again...

2007-10-23T13:43:00.000+10:00

Dave Grohl is a legend. He is a rock musical genius.

This is the second track off the new Foo Fighters album, and it's probably the best track on the album. They're all great, but this one is the one I come back to. This one and 'Stranger things have happened' are my personal standouts.

The song starts out quite restrained, and builds over the first couple of minutes, until the middle of the song. It busts out with a brief blast, then comes back to the previous melody. You just know something is coming, but not when you expect it. Just as you think it might tail off, it busts out again in a fantastic guitar tone till the end of the song.

All songs should be this good.

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Bad luck coming in threes...the cycling gods frown upon me thrice

2007-10-22T12:23:00.000+10:00

They say bad luck comes in threes. I guess this proves it is pretty much correct.

Sunday on my regular road ride, I pull up at the turnaround mark with the other rider I was with, and step off the bike. Left foot down, swing the right off, just like usual. Put my right foot down and immediately thought "something doesnt feel right". At first I thought it was just my knee flexing out, which was painful from kicking a football around for an hour the day before. Stepped over to a large table where we sit for a drink and a stretch, and look down.

Not good.

The sole plate of my right shoe is coming away from the shoe itself. 5 month old shoes! After a little swearing and inspection, I figure I'm right to get home. Luckily I was, but now I'm real annoyed. I'm supposed to ride a 90km charity ride in two weeks, and I dont think I'll get a replacement in that time. And I'm sure not spending any more money for a short term pair. It'll be back to SPD and a different bike, which doesnt leave me much time to tune the position.

You'd think a medium-high level pair of shoes would last longer than 600km. I'm not a power sprinter, nor a particularly powerful climber. I like to blast up shorter hills now and then, but nothing your average recreational cyclist wouldnt do. And certainly nothing as tough as your amateur racer or triathlete would work. I dont walk around in them a lot, and its not the side I put on the ground when I stop. At best, I hope its just a case of swap them over, and the store can claim warranty on them and send them back. It has made me slightly sceptical of another pair the same, but I hope I at least get a chance to test another pair and see if it wasnt just poor quality of one pair of shoes.

That should be my run of bad luck over for a while now.

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Greatest Inventions: #76

2007-10-19T08:42:00.000+10:00

Stretchy shoe laces.

Yes, they're yellow. I like them. You can get them in other colours, but these ones were on sale last night.

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Poll Dance #1

2007-10-18T14:25:00.000+10:00

The curse of the commute

2007-10-18T13:56:00.000+10:00

OK, so a couple of weeks ago I decide to ride to work. It's got a few hills in the way, nothing I couldnt go over at a nice easy rate. But, halfway to work that first time I break the chain. Roadside fix, get to work, no biggie. Going home, the thing threatens to bust again, so I stop, call the family, and they come rescue me from the roadside. At least the two guys who passed me as I sat under a nice tree asked if I needed anything.

So, yesterday, for an Australia-wide initiative originating in Victoria called 'Ride to Work Day', I do the same.

Pretty much halfway in, again, this...

I noticed the back was going a little squirmy, and look down to see a slowly deflating rear. Stop, climb off, break out the mini-pump. The second I put the pump head on and flicked the lever, the valve completely detaches itself from the tube.

So, quick change, fresh tube, pump it to 60PSI (about as good as I can get with the mini-pump and enough to get me riding), and off to work.

I was trying to figure out why this happened, as its never happened to me before. I'm thinking maybe I ran the ring too tight against the rim, and in using the floor pump to hit 110PSI its stressed the joint so much that riding has pushed the limits of the tube. That, plus a 90kg rider, and a few bumps on the way has seen the flex in the valve overcome the tube. Cause the valve was pretty tight against the rim it has had nowhere to go. Except for out.

Maybe if I'm doing this more often I should get some 28C wheels instead of 23C's.

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Chain, dang

2007-10-08T12:13:00.000+10:00

This is not really what you want to see when you hear a noise riding home from work on a warm friday afternoon.

Especially after having fixed the same chain after it broke riding TO work that morning.

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Try, try again

2007-10-03T08:41:00.000+10:00

The Australian Open tennis is coming up early next year. It seems Lleyton Hewitt succeeded in getting the courts changed to his liking.

It had better help.

Now we have 'True Blue' (seriously, they trade marked the colour name) plexicushion courts in place of the rebound ace of past opens. I've said it before and I'll say it again: If you're good enough, you'll win. No matter the surface. Roger's proved that. OK, so he hasn't won a slam on clay. Does he moan and ask the organisers to change it? No. He gets on with it.

Let's hope by changing the surface that it doesnt mean someone else will find it even more to their liking and roll through the tournament in straight sets.

Lleyton had better perform at this Australian Open, or he's going to have a lot of voices aimed squarely at him. Questioning.

Answers? We'll see.

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Idiots, averted!

2007-09-25T12:48:00.000+10:00

Well, it nearly happened sunday.

Another bike crash, averted!

Riding through Narrabeen, some clown in a taxi decides to turn left right in front of me. And I do mean right in front of me. Lucky I was already over the brake hoods so I grabbed them both hard. Which of course resulted in unweighting the back wheel and locking it up for a nice long skid a fixed gear rider would've been proud of. We're talking 9 metres here. I could've won a skidding competition, I tells ya.

Not sure if the cab driver didnt see me, or just had no idea of speed v. distance, but this was as close as I've been without actually hitting the car. I did manage to get the boot slap as he turned across me, his wide-eyed stare from the drivers window as I two-finger saluted him perhaps indicated that he had no idea I was there.

I understand. You can easily miss seeing a guy in a red and silver long sleeve jersey, bright blue knicks, riding a silver bike, in sunshine.

This following a fellow rider crashing into another inanimate object and destroying his front end two weeks ago. He says he was lost in thought. Probably his next thought was 'how did I get down here?' as he lay on the concrete pedestrian safety island. There's still a black mark on the front edge where he went onto it. A couple of fractured ribs, a fractured shoulder blade and two weeks of headaches later, he'll probably be back riding soon. He'll need a new helmet too, after splitting the old one into two pieces.

The joys of riding. Probably get less injuries on a mountain bike riding trails.

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Song of the Week: Black Velvet Band

2007-09-24T10:49:00.000+10:00

Black Velvet Band
words and music traditional

In a neat little town they call Belfast
Apprenticed in trade I was bound
And many's the hour of sweet happiness
I spent in that neat little town
Till bad misfortune befell me
That caused me to stray from the land
Far away from my friends and relations
To follow the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like the diamond
You'd think she was queen of the land
And her hair hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

As I was out strolling down broadway
Not intending to go very far
I met with a frolicksome damsel
Applying her trade in a bar
Well a watch she took from a customer
And she slipped it right into my hand
Then the Watch came and put me in prison
Bad luck to the black velvet band

Before judge and jury next morning
For our trial I had to appear
The judge, he said, "My young fellow,
The case against you is quite clear.
Well seven years is your sentence.
You're going to Van Diemen's Land.
Far away from your friends and relations
To follow the black velvet band."

So come all you jolly young fellows
I'd have you take warning by me
Whenever you're out on the liquor
Beware of the pretty colleen
For she'll fill you with whiskey and porter
Until you're not able to stand
And the very next thing that you notice
You've landed in Van Diemen's Land

The Dropkick Murphys version has a few changed lyrics that pull the song more into their Boston punk/rock lineage of traditional Irish cover versions:

DKM: Black Velvet Band

In a neat little town they call Brockton
Apprenticed in trade I was bound
And many an hour's sweet happiness
I spent in that neat little town
Then bad misfortune befell me
That caused me to stray from the land
Far away from my friends and companions
To follow the black velvet band

Well, I was out strolling one evening
Not intending to stay very long
When I met a frolicsome damsel
As she came t-ripping along
A watch she pulled out a'pocket
And slipped it right into my hand
On the very first night that I met her
Bad luck to the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like the diamonds
You'd think she was queen of the land
And her hair hung over her shoulder
Tied up in a black velvet band

Before judge and jury next morning
Both of us did appear
A gentleman claimed his jewelry
And the case against us was clear
Now seven long years transportation
Right down to Van Diemen's land
Far away from my friends and companions
To follow the black velvet band

Her eyes they shone like the diamonds
You'd think she was queen of the land
And her hair hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

So come all you jolly young fellows
I'd have you take warning by me
Whenever you're out on the liquor
Beware of the pretty colleen
She'll fill you with whiskey and porter
Until you're not able to stand
And the very next thing you'd know
You've landed in Van Diemen's Land

Her eyes they shone like the diamonds
You'd think she was queen of the land
And her hair hung over her shoulder
Tied up with a black velvet band

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This is (witticism here ending in AAAAAAAA)

2007-09-17T21:23:00.000+10:00

I've been getting into the internet meme that is 300.this.is of late.

Those of you who have seen 300 (I, as yet, have not) will recognise the scene. The face of the lead character has since been morphed into many, many other locales with humorous results. Those of you who dont know it, by the time you follow one or two of the links, will recognise it if you've spent any time on message boards, chat rooms or humour sites.

Mirth aplenty here:
livejournal entry
ED entry
Dossier: Les parodies du film 300
This is Harold
Badges

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Of Real Racers and Road Roughies

2007-09-14T12:34:00.000+10:00

Real Racers

Following allegations of theft and subterfuge in the Formula 1, the World Motor Sport Council has announced a decision regarding the McLaren/Ferrari saga.

In a big call, McLaren have been fined US$100million for after they were found to be in possession of Ferrari technical data, and may have incorporated it into their 2007 car.

Full report here.

Naturally, Ferrari are satisfied with the verdict. This hands them the 2007 title in an undeserving car. McLaren drivers Fernando Alonso and Lewis Hamilton are able to score points individually, but the team is barred from accruing any more constructors championship points.

With such a small community as Formula 1 designers, engineers and drivers, the passing of data is inevitable. But the large amount that the McLaren designer had amassed obviously warranted investigation. Whats to stop someone taking a photo of a Ferrari test, taking it back to the McLaren labs and divining the science behind it?

I cant shake a feeling...Ferrari are Italian, correct? Serie A, anyone??

If Ferrari were honest about this, they'd turn down the constructors championship this season, as would everyone else.

Road Roughies

To the bloke in the maroon Magna that tailgated me along Frenches Forest Road yesterday evening:
1. Learn where the nose of your car is or learn to be patient.
2. Dont get stuck into me cause you cant keep up once we travelled from the 50km/h zone to the 70km/h zone.
3. Dont go off like a frog in a sock cause you dont like the two finger salute.
4. You obviously fail to see the irony in giving me the 'nobody thinks big of you' finger wave as you drive by me at 25km/h over the speed limit.
5. Next time you do it I WILL BRAKE TEST YOU, BE AWARE!

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STUFF! (that looks like other stuff)*: Part 1

2007-09-11T09:22:00.000+10:00

In what is hoped to become a semi-regular series, I bring you part one of...

STUFF!
(that looks like other stuff)*

Firstly, a submitted picture entitled Ham Happy:

There's nothing like a cheerful face greeting you first thing in the morning, is there now?

Secondly, incontrovertible proof of dinosaur activity in Melbourne (sometime pre-2007):

Or it might just be bark.

Thirdly, the natural occurrence of the bicycle, with bike fork twig:

Then again, it might just be an upside-down stick.

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*A shamelessly stolen idea, thanks Ben.

Yet another web presence opportunity - velospace.org

2007-09-03T09:28:00.000+10:00

In the multitudes of corners of this thing called the internet, there are a great many places and spaces (as they are increasingly called) where people can put portions of their lives, loves, or lovelives on display.

For cyclists, there are a few. Some highly specialised, like Fixed Gear Gallery (catering to, you guessed it, fixed gear bicycles). Not that I have anything against fixed gear bikes, but a Billy Connolly line springs to mind when he talks of being a vegetarian. "I had a wee problem...I didnt like other vegetarians!" Insert 'fixed gear riders' in place of vegetarians and you have a fair idea of the culture behind it at present. Enough on that from me. For a good blast at that whole scene, read BikeSnobNYC. Super blog.

I have succumbed, again. Aside from this blog, my other blog (albeit far less frequently posted to), and a couple of other things I may or may not have forgotten about, I have posted a bicycle of mine on velospace.org.

Velospace describes itself thus: "velospace has one goal: to connect bike enthusiasts". In order to avoid flame wars between the road bike/mountain bike/fixed gear masses, Rule 1 of the site simply states: "Rule 1. Don't be a jerk."

Anyway, enough of that. Here is the link to my bike. Feel free to wander over, then wander around. I challenge you to try to navigate this site simply by the random button and NOT get a fixed gear hipster doofus bike within three clicks. Cant be done. They're like rabbits, breeding incessantly. At least until someone deems them uncool and they all sell them and start riding Vespas again. It doesnt say I cant be a jerk on here or BSNYC now, does it?

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When famous friends are very helpful

2007-08-21T16:38:00.000+10:00

This is something that sh*ts me no end.

Mark Waugh, ex-Australian cricketer, caught speeding a few months ago in country NSW. 123km/h in an 80km/h zone. Claims he "didnt even realise it was an 80 zone". Fair enough. Yet, last time I checked, the maximum speed on NSW highways is 100km/h, aside from the 110 on the freeway system. So, be it an 80, 100 or 100km/h zone, you were still speeding you knob.

So, ex-Australian cricket captain Mark Taylor and ex-Australian Rugby Union coach and broadcaster Alan Jones write glowing letters of reference to show the law what a nice guy he is, and how this such an out of character move for Mark. Never mind the 5 speeding infringements over three weeks in 2001. That must have been very out of character.

He'd "understand the gravity of the situation", as Alan Jones puts it, more if he got a nice fat fine or a few months free of the encumbrance of a driving licence like a normal citizen.

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Best Song Ever

2007-08-15T10:47:00.000+10:00

A while back I did a post on the Best Australian Song ever written.

Following a bit of listening to my past collection of music, I've decided to publish my opinion on the Best Song ever written, ever...ever...

Brace yourselves.

The award goes to...the Jimmy Webb penned, Glen Campbell vocalised "Wichita Lineman".

Lyrically perfect, musically sweet, mournful, sweeping, (insert next superlative), etc, etc.

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In praise of the female bass player

2007-08-01T11:03:00.000+10:00

There is a fine tradition of rock and grunge bands in particular having female bass players.

It is nearly mandatory to mention above all for several reasons one Melissa auf Der Maur. Having played with bands such as Hole, and replacing D'Arcy in the Smashing Pumpkins, she's a great player, she's a redhead to boot, and (forgive me for being shallow here a minute) she's sexy while she does it.

The Forerunners

You cant even start this section without mentioning Suzi Quatro. Her career started in the 1970's and is still running. She is the archetypal female bass player. She rocks, and she loves doing it.

Of course, there are many other notables including, but not limited to:
Tina Weymouth of Talking Heads
Margot Olaverra and Kathy Valentine from The Go-Go's
Kim Gordon from Sonic Youth

From the 1970's to the early 1990's the female bass player started growing in stature (not literally, of course). And the Go-Go's are still playing to date as well.

The Second Batch

I've tried my best to arrange these in chronological order, so don't get stuck into me if I've duffed it. Some of these girls may have gotten into bands due to the names above, maybe not. Maybe they just decided that bass was what they wanted to do. Whichever, they do it well.

Michie Nakatani and Atsuko Yamano from Shonen Knife
Jo Bench from Bolt Thrower
Jennifer Finch, Gail Greenwood, and Janis Tanaka from L7
Michelle Leon and Maureen Herman from Babes in Toyland
Kim Deal from The Pixies
D'Arcy from The Smashing Pumpkins
Josephine Wiggs from The Breeders
Kira Roessler from Black Flag
Paz Lenchantin from A Perfect Circle
Nadja and Rayna from Coal Chamber
"Yoshie", Yoshiko Yamaguchi and Akiko Omo from The 5,6,7,8's

Many of these girls are still playing, and damn well. The latest couple that I've listened to and enjoyed their subtle work are:
Nikki Monninger from Silversun Pickups
Ginger Reyes from The Smashing Pumpkins

The Australian Connection

This is also a fine tradition in Australian bands, featuring forerunning all-girl bands of note, such as Nitocris and The Blitz Babiez. And it's some list:
Peggy Frew from Art of Fighting
Janet from Spiderbait
Kellie Lloyd from Screamfeeder
Patricia Young from The Clouds
Rayke Stapleton from Pollyanna
Vanessa Thornton from Jebediah
Stephanie Ashworth from Something For Kate
Irit from Cor'delle (shameless plug for my brothers band)

Of course, if you want a well put together, complete, comprehensive list, see BassGirls.com.

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